Don't let the bed bugs bite!
by modeltd09
Summary: lily is changing. and she doesn't know who she is anymore. her best friends can't even help her. so who can? well who else then james potter! and what will happen as lily and her two best friends grow closer and closer to the marauders? lilyjames. R&R!
1. Perfection

Lily walked into the Great Hall. This year was going to be perfect. She had her perfect friends, her perfect classes, her perfect boyfriend. And she was Head Girl. Sure, it was with that git Potter, but she would live. She had everything she had ever wanted. Danny came up and gave her a swift kiss on the cheek, promising more for later. She smiled up at him. "Hey, long time no see," she teased. They had just made out the entire way to school on the Hogwarts Express. "It was," Danny teased back, "I missed you."

This was her Danny. Safe and dependable. He let her be independent. He never called her "his woman." And she in turn never called him "her man." Except when she was feeling extreme affection for him, that's when she called him "Her Danny." She gave Danny a quick squeeze, then ran and joined her best friends Katy and Emma.

"Hey, guys! I missed you soooo much!" She squealed. Lily didn't need to ask either of them how their summers had been. They had exchanged letters so frequently; they might as well had been with each other. Just then Dumbledore announced his presence, along with the rules for the school year and a warm welcome. Finally he ended with "Let the Feast begin!" The food was delicious as it had been for the past 6 years and Lily, Katy, and Emma chatted and laughed till it was time to go to their dormitories.

Lily bid farewell to Katy and Emma in a dramatic fashion and told Danny she was going to go take care of her Head duties and that she would see him in the morning. This resulted in a chaste kiss on the lips and a "sleep well, sweetie." Then she went off to deal with Potter… and the prefects of course.

James walked into the Great Hall. He saw her. Gorgeous, beautiful, lovely, not his… Lily Evans. Sirius caught James' look of longing and stuck his elbow in James' stomach.

"Another long year of Prongs complaining about his unattainable Lily… greeeaat!"

"She can't be mine if she's unattainable," retorted James. But how he wished she was. Remus cast a pitiful glance in James' direction.

"Hey, at least James cares about someone other than himself!" Remus said defensively. Sirius gasped in mock offence.

"You couldn't possibly be talking about the most handsome boy in the school, who can have a different girl every week, right in front of him would you, Moony?" He then proceeded to ruffle his jet black hair, making a few girls swoon in his wake. He looked back at them, winked, and then laughed as he and his friends made their way to their usual spot at the Gryffindor table. After Dumbledore had made his speech, dinner was eaten with fervor. James looked up at the end of the feast to see Lily kissing her stupid boyfriend Kingsley. James immediately stood up.

"Got to go… Head duties…" he mumbled before hastily following Lily.

"Depends on what you mean by 'head'" muttered Sirius after James was out of ear shot.

"Hullo, Evans," greeted James. This was a new year, new chances. He had survived a tough summer. Without the help of Sirius and Remus, especially Remus, James would have been in a lot of trouble. The Potter's family, his little sister, Samantha, and his parents had been killed by Voldemort while he had been at a foolish quidditch game with Sirius and Remus. Sirius had been living with the Potters since he had refused to join up with the Dark Lord along with the rest of the Black family. Remus and the Lupins graciously took both boys in. James would never fully heal but Sirius and Remus had helped to get closer to his normal self in countless ways. Most importantly, they reminded him that a great wizard like himself needed to be strong for others. He reminded himself that those "others" included Lily. She had also indirectly helped him. The result was more mature and responsible, but still fun loving, James Potter. Lily's only response was a slight acknowledgement.

"Potter," she nodded at him.

"How was your summer?" he asked brightly.

"Great, actually, considering you weren't there," she answered, quite coolly. Potter had always been a nuisance. He thought he was better than everyone else. Why he thought that she had no clue. But he was arrogant, supercilious and played nasty tricks on many people, including her. She didn't bother to ask him how his summer was, fully expecting to be enlightened anyway. To her surprise, for the first time she was incorrect. Potter smiled and then they went on to accomplish their Head duties in record time. They then made their way up to the Head dormitories. Again to her surprise, she was first to speak. "Good night, Potter," she told him from the opposite stairwell.

James almost stopped dead in his tracks. Lily Evans had just initiated conversation with him. Ok, maybe not a full conversation but a brief CONVERSATION just the same. He was about to do a jig right there on the stairs. "Sleep tight, Evans," he said sweetly.

"Don't let the bed bugs bite," she giggled. It was what her dad and she used to say when she was younger. Lily thought about Potter. Maybe he had changed. Maybe he was more mature. Maybe… her thoughts were interrupted.

"Hey, Evans?"

"Yeah?"

"Will you go out with me?"

Nope, he had not changed. Well, not enough anyway. "POTTER!" Lily half yelled, half grunted in frustration. She then slammed the door in his face and went to bed, unsure of exactly how perfect this year was really going to turn out to be.

Lily walked down to the Head commons fully expecting Potter to be there. He was not but a delicious breakfast was. Next to it was a note:

_Dear Lily,_

_Happy first day of school. Or not? _

_I love you._

_-Danny Kinsgley_

Lily smiled to herself. Her boyfriend was so great! She gorged herself till she thought she was going to burst. Then she went upstairs, showered and changed into her jeans and white t-shirt under her school robes. Katy once had said that Lily had no fashion. She never wore anything trendy, she never dressed up. Lily had retorted she never had a reason to. Emma had chimed in, saying that Lily never wore make-up or did her hair nicely. Feeling ganged up on, Lily silenced both girls with a deathly glare. Katy quickly back-peddled saying that Lily was so pretty she didn't need any of that stuff. Emma readily agreed.

That was one of the reasons she loved Danny. He liked her casualness. He loved her for herself. Right? Well, when she was casual she was herself. Not some made-up Barbie. And he loved her. So yes, he loved her for her. After contemplating life for a bit, she ran downstairs, noticed she had about 2 minutes to get to Advanced Transfiguration, realized she had no idea where the classroom was and was about to bolt out the door when she noticed another note for her. This one said "Lily" on the outside in Potter's chicken scratch handwriting. Lily hesitated for half-a-second thinking that picking up this note could transport her to some unknown place or turn her hair bright pink, but she picked it up anyway.

_Dearest, Darlingest Lilykins,_

_I realized that you are running a tad late for class. I enclosed a map to Advanced Transfiguration. I LOOOVVEEE YOOOUUU!_

_Your lover forever,_

_James Potter_

Lily didn't know whether to laugh or just be annoyed. Pushing the decision aside, she rushed out of the commons and, thanks to Potter's map, was only 1 minute late. She caught Potter's eye, gave him a silent "Thank You", and sat next to Danny, who greeted her with a big hug. "Thanks so much for the breakfast, Danny. That was so sweet," Lily thanked him with a kiss on the cheek. "Anything for you, Lily," he responded. "Wait till I tell Katy and Emma at lunch. They're going to be so jealous!" She did and they were. The rest of the week passed as normal. And every night Lily would wish Potter "Good Night" and he would respond with "Sleep Tight" and she would end with "Don't Let the Bed Bugs Bite."

The weeks went on and so did Lily's routine. The only thing that changed was her feelings towards Potter. She was noticing his newfound maturity more and more, especially during Prefect Meetings. After dinner, Potter would help Lily with her Transfiguration homework and she would help him with his Charms. Sometimes, just sometimes, Lily would actually call Potter James in her head.

Everyone was noticing the blooming friendship. "Emma, Lily just spoke to James… as in not yelled or screamed at him. She didn't even accuse him of being arrogant," Katy told Emma the first time she saw this happen. "Moony, Lily just slapped James on the shoulder, in a _friend_ly way," an astonished Sirius reported to an equally astounded Remus. Even the teachers were noticing. "Do you think Lily returns Mr. Potter's feelings, Albus? I mean, it's obvious to us that he loves her," Professor McGonagall asked the Headmaster. "I don't think so. Not yet," he answered with a twinkle in his eyes. Who should have over heard them other than Mr. Kingsley.

"You're sure?" Danny asked for the millionth time that day.

"Yes, Danny," Lily answered… again! The first time Danny had asked her if she had feelings for James it had been a little cute to know that he cared. But Lily did not like feeling possessed as she felt right now. She was thoroughly ANNOYED! "Listen to me. I love you. I'm cordial to Potter because we're both Heads, Ok?" she finally told him.

"Ok. I'm sorry, Lily," he muttered against her lips.

"All right, then. Where did you get these crazy ideas any way?" Lily pulled away just long enough to ask. Danny hesitated. Lily did not like being the center of attention and knowing that the teachers were gossiping about her would NOT make her feel good.

"No where," he said through another kiss. Lily smiled. She liked this feeling.

"Wait. I can't, Danny. Not tonight. I have tons of homework before break." Lily pushed Danny away.

"I understand. Good night, Lily. I love you," he said as he hugged her good night.

This was another reason Lily loved Danny. He knew that she was a book worm and he love her for it. Even on nights like tonight where she put her work first, just for a little while. He still loved her. "Goodnight. I love you, too."

Lily bounded up stairs after finishing her homework. She changed into her pajamas and was about to go to sleep when she realized she had almost forgotten her last part of her routine. She was still excited that tomorrow would be the first day of Christmas Break. She ran outside to wish Potter good night. But before she could say anything, she saw something she had never seen before.


	2. Christmas Break

James Potter was in the Heads Common room. And was that?... Was he…. crying? No that's… that wasn't possible. But there he was. Potter's eyes were glistening with tears. Lily hadn't really been his friend, if you could even call him her friend, for very long. But she knew she had to comfort him in whatever way she could. "Umm.. er.. Potter? Are you OK?" Stupid really. Come on, Lily. He was CRYING! Of course he wasn't ok!

"They won't be there. I have to stay at Hogwarts for Christmas," he replied. James wasn't even looking at her. He was just staring into the crackling fire.

"Who won't be there?" Lily asked gently.

"My mum, my dad, Samantha. They're gone. Forever," James said, again not even looking at Lily. She assumed the worst.

"They… did they… are they dead?" James suddenly turned his head to face her.

"Killed. By Voldemort himself." Lily gasped. She had had no idea! How could a mere 17-year old… hell _anybody_ live like that? How did he cope?

"Do Sirius and Remus know?" was all Lily could think to ask.

"They were at the quidditch game with me the night my family was murdered." Of course they knew! Duh, Lily. Wait… since when did Lily talk to herself? "Padfoot and I stayed with Moony the rest of the summer. But I don't want to impose on them again. So I'm stuck here at Hogwarts. With out my… even A family." James looked back at the fire.

Before Lily could think about what she was saying, "That's not true," came out of her mouth. James looked at Lily. What could she possibly be saying? Was she inviting him over for Christmas? Out of pity… no he would never accept anyone's pity.

"Evans, if you're inviting me to your house over the break, it's just out of pity. I don't want your pity," he said. But his eyes told her differently. James _needed_ family over break. And she was going to do whatever it took to get him to her home. Even if it meant lying.

"I'm not _inviting_ you, Potter," Lily said with a scoff. "Dumbledore told me to tell you that we have Head stuff to work on over the break. He said that we had to spend it together. And since you don't have anywhere to go (she added that part gently) and I want to go home, I think the most logical answer would be for you to come to my house. I would not say I _invited _you to my house, rather I was _forced_." And this particular lie she had said with conviction. Because James lapped it up like honey.

"Well, if Dumbledore insists," he said.

"Insists? More like commands," Lily grumbled irritably.

"Ok. Well then I better go pack."

"Good night, Potter."

"Sleep tight, Evans."

"Don't let the bed bugs bite."

"Will you go out with me, Evans?"

"How about… no, Potter," Lily answered with a smirk. That put James in a better mood, because for the first time ever, Lily had not just answered "POTTER!"

The next day Lily went to see Katy and Emma first. "Hey guys. I umm.. ok you're going to think I'm crazy but last night I invited Potter over for Christmas break." Both girls looked at Lily with shock.

"Are you serious?"

"Are you sick?"

"Should we send for Madame Pompfrey?"

"Girls, girls, I'm perfectly fine, serious and sane. It was odd circumstances. But I want you to promise me not to tell Danny." Lily didn't know what made herself say that last part. She didn't know where that came from. "Last night he was worrying that I was in love with Potter. Ha! But still, he would get really upset if he knew that Potter was going to spend Christmas at my house."

The two girls looked at Lily.

"Ok. This is really odd, Lil," said Katy.

"Yeah and really secretive. But we won't tell," added Emma.

"Thanks guys. Ok well lets get on then shall we," Lily asked her dearest friends.

"Yup, hello dearest," said Potter suddenly appearing.

"Ew. I was NOT talking to you, Potter." Lily then saw the flash of hurt in his eyes and felt guilty. It was gone almost immediately but it had been there. So she added, "But I guess you can join us in our compartment if you want."

"As you wish, Evans," said James with a bow.

The compartment with Katy and Emma on one side and James and Danny with Lily in between sat on the opposite side, was a little crowded but the train ride was fun all the same. Rhea and Thomas Evans were there to greet Lily and surprised that she had brought a boy along with her. They were even more surprised when she introduced him. "Mum, Dad, this is James Potter."

"My, my Lily. You never brought a boy home before… and your first is the infamous James Potter," exclaimed Thomas.

"Dad," muttered a blushing Lily. James smiled. So… he was her first boy to come home. But what was this? Mr. Evans had called him the "infamous" James Potter. James didn't think this was very good news. His beloved's family thought he was infamous. He'd have to work on that.

Lily looked at her mother who was obviously questioning the whole bringing-home-a-boy-for-Christmas thing. They exchanged a tacit glance, Lily promising to explain later. Rhea extended her hand, "Well, it is a pleasure to meet you, James."

"No, no the pleasure is all mine," he said with the famous Potter charm.

"Why, Lily, I don't see how this boy could be the same infuriating Potter you complain about," exclaimed Thomas.

"Ok, Dad, you can stop now!" sighed a smiling Lily who was at the moment the same color as the brick wall behind her. They all piled into the car. It was James' first car ride and he was so excited. He stuck his head out the window of the back seat. It was about 15 degress outside. The Evans were all laughing at his passion for the cold wind in his face. They arrived home. The house was well sized though not _nearly_ as large as the Potter Mansion. They unpacked their bags and sat down for a delicious dinner prepared by Rhea.

"Mum, where is Petunia?" asked Lily.

"Who's Petunia?" returned James.

"She's my sister. She's not too found of magic, to put it lightly. But she loves me and I love her. So, Mum…?" answered Lily.

"She's coming tomorrow, with her fiancée, Vernon," Rhea finally answered.

"Tunia's engaged! Well, how is he? Is he handsome? Is he nice? Is he rich?" blabbered an excited Lily.

"Um. Well. He's a… good guy," answered her father, politely ignoring her latter questions. Dinner continued uneventfully. James cleared the table, washed the dishes and put them all away. He did this all with magic and very dramatically. Mr. and Mrs. Evans applauded and Lily just rolled her eyes, but she was smiling. It was good to be home.

"I'm going to go to bed," announced James.

"I'll show you to your room, then I'm turning in myself," said Lily.

"You mean we aren't going to be sharing a room?" whispered James to Lily as they walked up the stairs.

"Oh, shut it, Potter," she exclaimed and pounded him thoroughly on the shoulder. They reached his room. "Good night, Potter," said Lily.

"Sleep tight, Evans," responded James as Lily turned into her own room.

"Don't let the bed bugs bite," she ended as she closed the door behind her.

Downstairs, Rhea and Thomas had been listening.

"Oh, Tom, they're so cute together!"

"Honey, they're not even dating. We don't even know if they're friends!"

"What are you talking about? She brought him home! And didn't you just hear that? That was what you and Lily used to say to each other right before bed when she was little."

"Yes, I know. I remember. They do look so happy together. Well, we'll see."

Lily woke earlier than James the next day. She went downstairs to make coffee, knowing full well that the result would be her mother arriving downstairs. Sure enough, down came Rhea, groggy but happy to be smelling someone else making coffee for once.

"Hey, Mum," greeted Lily.

"Hey, sweetie. Thanks for making coffee," her mother replied. "I'm guessing your going to tell me why James is here now?"

"Yeah. Well, Mummy, James' family died, rather, was murdered over the summer. By Lord Voldemort. I just couldn't stand to see him moping about around Christmas without family. I mean that… it was just so sad, Mum," Lily explained to her mother.

Rhea was proud of Lily. It was so mature of her to acknowledge James' problem and try to comfort him when he had spent so long teasing her and she had hated him for what seemed like forever.

"I'm proud of you, sweetie," Rhea told her daughter. "You did the right thing. And really, James isn't that bad, is he?"

"I guess not, Mum, but I hope your not planning a wedding already. I'm still in love with and dating Danny," Lily reminded her mum.

"She knows, hon, and I think you did a really great thing, by the way," said Thomas, announcing his presence.

"Morning, Dad, how long have you been there?"

"Long enough. How did you sleep?" The morning continued as normal and James arrived in just enough time to inhale some of Rhea's delicious pancakes. When Pentunia and Vernon arrived, everyone was freshly showered and clothed.

"Hey, Tunia!" squealed Lily, jumping into Petunia's open arms.

"Hey, Lils. How are you? Oh wait. Let me introduce you to the love of my life, Vernon Dursely," Petunia responded in a rush. Lily looked to Vernon. He was huge! And he didn't even shake her out stretched hand. She pulled it back quickly, not wanting anyone else to see. But of course James had.

Vernon looked at Lily. How anyone like his lovely Petunia could be related to such a plain Jane he didn't understand. She wasn't even wearing any make-up, just jeans and a t-shirt. He then noticed the handsome man standing in the corner and immediately disliked him for being good looking. This was Vernon's natural tendency. (**A/N: **That's why he loved Petunia so much) Lily noticed Vernon's wandering eye.

"Oh right, Petunia and um Vernon, this is my um… er… this is James Potter," said an uncertain Lily. Luckily, James was unflustered. He immediately stuck out his hand, making sure that Vernon shook it.

"How nice to meet you, Petunia… Vernon. It really is a pleasure," James said with his natural Potter charm and smile. Even Petunia was a little taken aback. She pulled her sister aside.

"Quite a catch you got there, Lily," Petunia said, eyeing Potter.

"What? Me and POTTER! No way. Ask Mum to explain. For the last time, I'm dating and am still in love with Danny Kingsley," Lily retorted.

"Oh right, Danny. He's nice too, but why isn't _Danny_ here and James- sorry, Potter- is?" smirked Petunia. Lily didn't have an answer so she just walked away, a little curious herself. That night, after dinner, the rest of the family heard the "Goodnight, Potter" "Sleep tight, Evans" "Don't let the bed bugs bite" and Petunia and Rhea exchanged knowing glances.

The next morning Lily woke up early and as a surprise for everyone for Christmas Day, decided to make fresh blueberry muffins. She had just started when she dropped the cupcake pan on the floor with a loud clatter. It was ok; her family members were all sound sleepers. But she forgot about James. She continued her baking, something she found she missed sorely while she was at Hogwarts. She turned on some music quietly and was dancing around the kitchen pouring, mixing, cleaning, cutting, and spraying. James watched on. He was tempted to hop into the kitchen and join her but he realized this was special Lily time. Yet, he still couldn't leave. God, Lily's eyes were so pretty, especially when she was so happy. They were sparkling like stars in the sky. She was so happy and carefree. He suddenly noticed that she was putting the uncooked muffins in the oven and tip-toed as fast and silently as he could up the stairs. He snuck back into his bed just in time to hear Lily following him up, coming to wake everyone.

They all groggily went downstairs where the finished blueberry muffins were just coming out of the oven and the fresh fruit have been cut. Suddenly, the knowledge of what day it was dawned on everyone. It seemed millions of "Happy Christmas" exchanges were made before everyone ate the delicious meal and thanked Lily profusely, except Vernon of course, who wasn't much into thanking people for things.

"Can I help you clean up, Lily?"

"I've got it, Daddy," Lily kindly replied. But Thomas got up to help her anyway. James saw the brief look of annoyance on Lily's face. Or maybe he didn't because it passed as soon as he saw it. He then smiled at Lily's fierce independence and knew that the look _had_ been there. Every time Thomas opened a cabinet so that Lily, with her armful of dishes needn't put them down, she would put the dishes down on the counter, close the cabinets and reopen them. But she never did so in plain sight of her father. James heard Mrs. Evans sigh next to him and turned to face her. She was smiling as well.

"Sometimes I wonder if Lily is too independent. You know, everyone has to lean on someone else at least once in their lives," Rhea said absent mindedly, forgetting all the "leaning on" James had had to do recently.

"She's perfect just the way she is," James replied, turning back to face the comical scene unfolding between Lily and Thomas before him. He thought Rhea had been too absorbed in her own thoughts to notice what he said. But he was wrong, and Rhea turned to face James, with a mixed look of affection, wonder, awe and amusement.


	3. Presents and Anger

After breakfast (and the clean-up) was over, everyone retreated to the living room where the Christmas tree was. And, of course, underneath the Christmas tree were tons of presents. It was then that Lily noticed a vital member of her family missing.

"Mum, where's Beast?" she asked.

"There's a beast? Where? I'll fight it!" exclaimed a suddenly excited James. He spun around in circles, searching for the unknown beast. Lily laughed hysterically.

"No, no. Beast is my dog. I was so caught up in all the excitement of being home I completely forgot about him!" Lily explained.

"Right. Beast is staying over at Aunt Victoria's house," said Rhea, finally answering Lily's question. She then added in a whisper, "Vernon doesn't like dogs."

Lily looked at Vernon. He didn't seem like the kind of person who _would_ like dogs. Oh well, if Petunia loved him, Lily could… well, at least put up with him.

"Do you think Aunt Torie would mind if I visited both her and Beast today? I really do miss him terribly," Lily asked. James looked at her. Was he just supposed to stay with Rhea, Thomas, Petunia and Vernon by himself? That would be a _little_ awkward. Thomas suddenly said exactly what was on James' mind.

"I don't think Victoria would mind, Lily. But you have to bring James with you. You wouldn't just leave him here with us would you?" Thomas knew that Lily didn't trust James enough not to spill tons of little details about her life to her parents.

"Uh… yeah. Don't think so. Potter, you're coming with me this afternoon," Lily commanded.

"Yes, your majesty," James replied with a smirk.

"Oh shut up, Potter." But Lily smiled while she made this second command.

After this brief interruption everyone continued to proceed to the living room to open gifts. Each person opened all of their presents at once while everyone else watched. Vernon went first, as he was used to. He received an expensive watch from Petunia, a silk neck tie from Rhea and Thomas and a promise from Lily for a belated present.

"Sorry, I had no idea that Tunia was engaged," she mumbled as an excuse.

The opening of presents continued as Petunia took her turn next. Lily had given her sister a paisley-print scarf and matching umbrella, her parents had given Petunia an antique clock to hang in the new house that Petunia and Vernon had just bought on 4 Privet Drive, Vernon gave his darling a delicate pearl necklace with matching earrings, and James gave Petunia a hug. To say the least, Petunia was a little flustered.

"Oh… erm… thank you?" Petunia stuttered.

"Sorry, but I didn't know Evans had a sister. So, happy Christmas," smiled James.

Rhea opened her presents next. Well, Thomas was the only person who had gotten her a present. Everyone else had just gotten the couple a gift. Thomas gave Rhea a beautiful diamond necklace from an American jewelry store called Tiffany's & Co. As a return gift Thomas received a big kiss from Rhea. Then he received his real gift, an expensive set of golf clubs, balls and a bag for them all.

"These are some strong sticks," James commented.

"They're golf clubs. Dad loves golfing," Lily told him.

"Golf," James repeated trying to wrap his tongue around the foreign word. "Is that a sport? Because it seems like it would be kind of violent."

"Yes, son," answered Thomas trying in vain to keep from laughing. "But, it is not violent at all. I'll teach you sometime."

"That sounds great!" replied James. His face was beaming and he seemed to be very grateful. But what the rest of the family took as a love of golf was really a love of someone else. And this promise was also a promise that James would be returning to the Evans' household, hopefully soon.

Rhea and Thomas took turns opening gifts from everyone else. They received a waffle iron that converted into a pancake frying pan from Petunia and Vernon; Lily gave them some films including Star Wars: Episode V - The Empire Strikes Back, Blues Brothers, and some others. Rhea and Thomas loved them because they were huge film buffs. James, of course, had no idea what a "film" was. But he too had gotten Lily's parents a present for Christmas. He had had little to work with because all Lily had told James about her parents were that they were doctors, which were like Muggle healers. So he got them each a very fancy pen, which wasn't much to them. Lily had also told James how Petunia didn't like magic so he explained in the card that the pens would write what you say or think, depending on if you held it in your left (for thinking) or right (for speaking) hand. They were both very grateful after they read the card.

It was now James' turn to open presents. Rhea and Thomas had surprised both Lily and James by getting him a few presents. James didn't know that they knew he now had no parents to receive presents from. From Lily's parents James received a case for his broom, his own special snitch with his initials carved on it and new pair of glasses. James was very pleased and thanked the Evans profusely. He then got to the present he had been waiting to open all morning. His present from Lily. He unwrapped it and started noticing… that his "present" was a book.

"_Hogwarts; A History_," James exclaimed. "Thanks so much, Evans. This is really the best present ever." He said it with as much enthusiasm as possible; he didn't want Lily to realize that his was a very dull present. It seemed to work; Lily seemed very happy and pleased.

It was finally Lily's turn. She had been patient all morning but now she tore through her presents like… well, like a little kid at Christmas. Her first present was from Petunia. It was the score from "Beauty and the Beast." (**A/N**: I know that "Beauty and the Beast" wasn't actually out yet so this is a tiny bit **A/U**)

"Oh my god! Potter, this is my favorite film of all time!" Lily explained.

"That's umm… nice," responded a perplexed James, who still did not understand the concept of a film.

Lily opened the gift from her parents next. It was a picture of Lily with Thomas, Rhea and Petunia at the beach from the previous summer. On a Post-It note was a quick scribble that read, "Tap it with your wand and whisper 'I Love You'" and Lily ran up to her room and did just that. She was astonished when she and her family started smiling and waving and looking lovingly at one another. Her muggle parents had managed to give her a magic picture. That way she wouldn't miss them as much while she was at school. Lily ran downstairs and gave them a big hug.

"Thanks so much, Mum and Dad! I love you!" she exclaimed.

Then she turned to open her last present, from James. She was a tad nervous because she didn't know what would pop out of that present. She looked cautiously from the unopened present to James and back again.

_This box is awfully small,_ Lily thought while she delicately opened her gift. _If there is something bad in it, I guess it can't be too horrible. _

She was correct. Not only was the something not horrible, it was magnificent. Lily gasped as she opened the velvet box. Inside was a gorgeous emerald bracelet. Lily was speechless. Rhea rushed over to see what was in the box because no one else could see from their varied positions around the room.

"My word, Lily! That is… is beautiful! Here, let me put it on you," Lily's mum said as she took the precious bracelet out of the box and put it onto Lily's pale wrist. It looked lovely on her, everyone agreed.

"Potter, this is… it's…. amazing. It's too much really," Lily whispered.

"No, no really. I want you to have it. It was my mother's." James added the last part softly, thinking that no one could hear him. But Lily heard and looked up at James with a look that almost said she understood.

"Thank you, Ja-Potter. Thank you so much."

It was later in the afternoon. Lily had called her aunt to confirm it would be alright if they came to visit. So off they went, in the snowy coldness of winter to visit Aunt Victoria and Beast.

James would never admit it to Lily, but he was a tad bit nervous about meeting a dog named "Beast." It didn't help that as soon as they showed up to Lily's aunt's house, a huge black dog rushed to the door.

"Hey, sweetie! Did you miss me?" James was amazed to hear Lily… cooing?

"Glad to know you cared. I missed you too, Lily," said a woman who suddenly appeared at the door alongside the furry monster. James almost gasped as the woman slowly turned the knob to open the door. But he would never let Lily see his fear… ever. The door opened and Beast ran out to greet his Lily. He jumped on her and she immediately grew stern

"No, Beast. Sit!" she commanded. Beast did as he was told. Lily rewarded him by bending down to his level and giving him a big hug. "Good boy."

"So now I see where you get your commanding nature from," James said.

"Be careful, Potter, or you'll be sleeping in the dog house outside while Beast sleeps in the house." James shut his mouth, he wasn't sure if Lily was joking or not but it would be safest to think that she was serious. Hey… Sirius. That was who this dog reminded him of.

_Of course,_ James thought, _this dog looks EXACTLY like Sirius' animal form._

"Hey, Aunt Torie," Lily exclaimed, finally letting go of Beast to give Victoria a bear hug.

"Well, hullo to you too," responded Torie. "Would you guys want to come in for some tea?"

"Sounds great," answered Lily, grateful to be going inside after nearly freezing to death walking to her aunt's house.

"Yeah, thanks," agreed James. They all went inside, drank, laughed and talked. Beast finally calmed down and was lying across James' and Lily's laps. Everyone was getting along fabulously and James and Lily were BOTH having a great time in each other's company. Victoria suddenly realized the time (it was 6:30) and immediately sent Lily and James home.

"Bye, baby boy," said Lily as she bade farewell to her canine friend.

"Bye, Beast," said James rubbing the dog's head. "Maybe I'll see you again soon," James whispered into Beast's fur. James might have been seeing things but he could have sworn he saw Beast look into his eyes with hope that they would see each other soon.

"Thank you so much for having us, Victoria," James said.

"Yeah, thanks Aunt Torie. It was fun!" added Lily. "Well, I'll see you next break."

"Oh, no problem. Bye, Lily. It was a pleasure meeting you, James," said Victoria as she waved them good-bye from the door. The pair walked quickly home and changed into warm clothes. Just as she was about to go downstairs, Lily walked pass James' open door. He was shirtless and Lily couldn't help but admire his body, well-sculpted from years of playing quidditch. When he put on a t-shirt, she almost found herself disappointed but quickly pushed those thoughts from her mind.

_What am I thinking? I HAVE a beautiful boyfriend. Danny… Danny… wait what was his last name? Oh right, Kinglsey. _

Lily was drawn from her internal monologue when she saw James pull out the book she had given him for Christmas. Lily thought it was hilarious, she couldn't believe he hadn't figured it out yet. Lily watched as James looked at the book and was about to put it down when Lily decided maybe it was time to intervene:

"Do you like your present, Potter?"

"Oh, Evans, yeah… it's… it's exactly what I wanted," James lied. Lily wasn't convinced.

"Really? Because I don't think I've seen you open it once."

"Well, that's because I was… reading it in my room."

"Cool. Show me what part you're at."

"Oh. Right. I'm right here," said James opening the book to show Lily some phony place in it where he supposedly had read up to. But as soon as he opened it he noticed that there were pictures of his favorite team, the quidditch Cannons. Under each picture that had only one player was that player's autograph.

"Holy Merlin! Evans, this is FANTASTIC! It's bloody BRILLIANT!" James screamed. Lily just smiled and laughed.

"I thought you would just figure it out on your own. But it turns out you would probably have never opened it." Lily never knew that making another person so happy would make her feel this elated. She was so pleased that James loved her gift. "You really thought I would give YOU a book for Christmas?"

James decided to push her a little bit.

"Well, I thought you hated me."

"I… well, I don't."

James moved a little closer to her.

"Do you like me then?"

Lily blushed.

"I never said that."

James moved even closer.

"Do you fancy me, Evans?"

Lily looked up at him. In James' eyes, she saw it; his pride.

_Why in the WORLD would she ever fancy a prat like Potter?_

Apparently, by the changed look in James' eyes, she had said that thought out loud. She quickly pushed James out of her way and rushed to her own room, and she didn't leave until she had to go eat dinner. For the rest of the night, Lily never once talked to or even looked at James. And he couldn't, for the life of him, figure out what on Earth he had done to make her so angry at him. And there it was, staring him in the face, his pride had made her angry. But what really made her angry was that she DID fancy him. She just hadn't realized it yet.

The next morning Lily walked into breakfast, where the Evans parents and Petunia and Vernon were discussing going out shopping that day. Lily was invited to go along, but she declined. She grabbed a bagel and went back up to her room in order to avoid any and all contact with Potter.

James awoke to Lily's footsteps coming up the stairs. He quickly opened his door to ask her what the hell he had done wrong. But she walked right by him into her room, slamming the door in his face. James sighed. He went downstairs to join the rest of the family for breakfast. Apparently, they had been talking about going out shopping that day.

"James, would you like to join the rest of us today? We're going out shopping," Thomas asked James.

"Uh… sure," replied a very sleepy James. He had been rather upset about Lily hating him again and hadn't gotten much sleep last night.

Thomas leaned closer. "Thank God. I thought I was going to be the only guy," he whispered.

"What about Vernon?" James asked.

"Oh… yeah… right… Vernon," Thomas mumbled.

Lily had heard the whole conversation from upstairs. Great! Now she was going to have the whole house to herself. She loved being home alone. She decided to stay upstairs until the whole group had left.

James returned upstairs and changed into jeans and a polo. He pulled on a jacket and went back downstairs to go shopping. As he was about to get into the car, he noticed someone missing.

"Where's Lily?"

"Oh, she's not coming. She wanted to stay home," answered Petunia.

"You know, I'll stay with her. I don't want her to get lonely," James responded, casting a smile to the rest of the family.

"Ok, thanks a lot," muttered Thomas sarcastically.

"See you later," James waved.

James went silently back into the house. Maybe, Lily wanted some alone time. Well, he needed to owl his friends anyway. So James went up to his room and sat on his bed with quill and parchment.

Lily had no idea that James had stayed. She thought she was home alone. So she went downstairs to do what she always did when she was home alone.

James was just about to start a letter when he heard music. It was coming from downstairs. He crept downstairs to see Lily, playing the piano and singing. It wasn't a song he recognized. But her voice was so lovely and he loved watching her skillful fingers fly across the piano.

_Tale as old as time,_

_True as it can be,_

_Barely even friends,_

_Then somebody bends unexpectedly,_

_Just a little change,_

_Small to say the least,_

_Both a little scared,_

_Neither one prepared,_

_Beauty and the Beast,_

_Ever just the same_

_Ever a surprise_

_Ever as before_

_Ever just as sure_

_As the sun will rise_

_Tale as old as time_

_Tune as old as song_

_Bittersweet and strange_

_Finding you can change_

_Learning you were wrong_

_Certain as the sun_

_Rising in the east_

_Tale as old as time_

_Song as old as rhyme_

_Beauty and the Beast_

_Tale as old as time_

_Song as old as rhyme_

_Beauty and the Beast_

James was tempted to start clapping. It was beautiful. Why didn't he know that she could sing and play the piano so well? Did anyone else know that? Did Kingsley know that? In the event that no one _did_ know, James decided to keep it to himself.

Lily continued to play the next song in her book which was something about her not marrying a guy named Gaston and that she actually wanted to do something with her life. And that she wished someone would just understand. She played this song well enough, but her heart just wasn't in it as it had been with that other one.

What James really wanted to do was go congratulate her on playing and singing so well but he contained himself again. He reluctantly returned to his room and wrote his letters to his friends.

Hey, Padfoot!

How's life? No, I have not asked Lily out. And, for the last time, I don't plan on doing that. I have accepted the fact that she will never love me. So I will wallow away the remainder of life in self-pity. Happy Christmas.

-Prongs

PS: Enclosed is your present.

Hi, Moony

How has your Christmas been? Mine has been absolutely splendid. I hope Sirius isn't driving you mad. Well, I actually do have a little problem. Lily's angry at me and I don't know why. Things were going great. And we were getting along fabulously. She got me a great present and when I mentioned that I thought she would get me a bad present because she hates me, she said "I don't." So I asked her if she liked me. She said "I never said that." But she was blushing so I took it that she did. So then I said, "Do you fancy me?" and she looked up at me and all of the sudden she screams "Why in the WORLD would I ever fancy a prat like Potter?" Then she pushed me away and now she's not speaking or looking at me. It's insane! HELP ME, REMUS!

-Prongs

PS: Happy Christmas.

Dear Peter,

Hi. Happy Christmas. Hope it's going well.

-James


	4. The Promise and a Lack of presents

It was finally time to return to Hogwarts. Lily lived quite a ways from King's Cross Station and though both teens could have apparated, they had to drive because Vernon still didn't know that Lily was a witch. Consequently, he obviously still didn't know that James was a wizard either. So into the car they went at around 4:30 in the morning.

James walked through the motions of getting dressed, putting his luggage in the car and finally getting in the front seat in such a daze he hadn't even realized he had been awake and was immediately asleep as soon as he buckled his seat belt.

Lily on the other hand was most definitely, if not wide, awake. She dressed and put her luggage in the trunk of the car. But by the time she went to get into the car, Potter was already sitting in the front seat. While Lily knew that having the back seat to herself gave her the luxury of laying down to sleep, she still thought it was supercilious of him to think that he could get the usually coveted front seat of _her_ car. Well, actually her Dad's car… but whatever. Lily was still angry with Potter for his arrogance and in her book this was just something else to add to the list.

Lily begrudgingly climbed into the back seat and was just about make a nasty comment about Potter or not respond when he said something to her, anything to make him mad. But she soon realized Potter was already sound asleep. She hated to admit it but she was jealous. It always took her forever to fall asleep, especially in a car. Mr. Evans got into the driver seat. Lily, at 17, could easily have driven but then the car would just be left at King's Cross and really, she was just too tired. Mr. Evans started the engine and went into reverse to drive out of the driveway. Lily looked back and waved at her mother and sister, who waved back with big smiles on their faces. They hadn't really had said proper good-byes considering they were all exhausted. They had said a quick "Bye, I love you," and her mother had reversed it, saying "I love you. Bye, Love" because she just HAD to say "Bye, Love," she always did.

Lily was just about to fall asleep in the back seat. They had been driving for about an hour already and Potter had slept through the whole time. It didn't matter that Lily was so tired if Potter had woken up and cursed her out, she would have no response. She still couldn't sleep.

_Ha. Like Potter would ever curse ME out. That in itself would probably leave me speechless. _Lily thought with a smile right before she fell asleep.

But no sooner had she closed her eyes when she was abruptly woken back up. Potter was screaming, at first incoherently.

"WASGOINGON?WASHAPPENING?HELP!HELP! WHERE'S LILY? WHAT'S GOING ON? IS VOLDEMORT ATTACKING!"

He proceeded to curse with much vigor. He just kept on screaming and turning around frantically in his seat. Lily was trying to make sense of the situation. The front window was down and the car was driving very fast. Both variables produced lots of fast wind and deafening noise in the car. James finally caught sight of a stunned speechless Lily in the back seat. Her mouth was slightly open and her face looked extremely surprised. He turned to see Mr. Evans staring at him while trying to keep his eye on the road. Mr. Evans didn't really need to keep his eyes on the road though, considering they were the only car for miles. Seeing a perfectly safe Lily and father, James calmed down until Lily could finally get an explanation out of him.

"Well? Are you going to tell us what THAT was all about?" Lily asked bluntly.

"Oh… well, um… I dunno _exactly_ how it happened but I was sound asleep and suddenly I felt the wind in my face and could hear that loud sound everywhere. I just jumped to a conclusion that something was wrong. I was rather startled you see." James kind of trailed off near the end of this story. Lily looked at him for a moment in silence, she was trying to make sure he was serious. He was and when she discovered this she burst out in laughing. She was followed almost immediately by Thomas.

"You actually thought… that something had happened… the window was down… you probably put it down with your foot by accident while you were… sleeping…" Lily managed to sputter out between laughs.

"What? How could I put down a window with my foot?" James was utterly perplexed.

"There's an electronic button… on the… armrest…" Thomas said, while laughing his head off. James examined the armrest to see a little black button with a picture in white that vaguely resembled a car window. He blushed a deep crimson color. Lily just kept laughing at him.

_You know, this break started off so well, _thought James, _but it ended with Lily both angry with and laughing at me. Not good, not good at all. _

Lily laughed so hard she was crying.

"Oh my God! You were hysterical!" Lily was so taken by the hilarity of the whole scenario that she reverted to her Muggle slang.

"It's not that funny," muttered James.

"Oh yes it is, Potter. Oh yes, it really is." Lily finished laughing with only a few short sighs and wiped the tears from her eyes. All the laughing had really worn her out and gave her the necessary push she needed to enter the land of dreams. James, sitting in the front seat, hadn't realized that Lily was asleep just yet. And he was just starting to get playful.

"Oh really, I bet it's not as funny as the time when I turned your hair pink and that boy you fancied came up and said…" and at this point in the story James turned around to see Lily's reaction to the thoroughly embarrassing story. But instead of being slapped he was confronted with Lily's peaceful sleeping face. His eyes seemed to relish every part of her face: her long eyelashes… her perfect size nose that wasn't too big or too small… her lips. And just as he turned around to control his urge to kiss her, James saw a small smile tug on those lips he had just been admiring. And in the dreams James entered as he fell asleep, he dreamt that Lily was dreaming about him as she slept.

"O.K. guys. We're here!" Thomas awoke the sleeping witch and wizard. Both slowly woke up, yawning and stretching. James jumped out before Lily and opened her door.

"Milady," he greeted her with a bow. He was hoping that after she had laughed at him so hard last night she might have forgiven him for whatever he had done so terribly wrong. He didn't get the response he had been hoping for and, against his better judgment, expecting. Lily grabbed the door handle, slammed the door shut in James' face, opened it again, shut the door behind her and hissed at James,

"I can do it _myself_! Thank you very much!" Lily suddenly caught sight of Katy and Emma dressed in odd Muggle clothing. She ran over to them excitedly.

Thomas caught the exchange and when James looked over at him, Thomas just raised one eye brow, questioningly.

"I hope she doesn't stay mad at me forever, or forever is going to seem like forever a million times over." James tried to laugh off the bitter comment Lily had made.

"James, would you come over here please? I'd like to have a word."

James suddenly felt a little scared of Thomas who had always seemed kind. All of a sudden, James realized as he stood next to Thomas that Thomas stood a good two inches taller and was probably 40 pounds heavier, all of that muscle.

"Don't worry. Well, you might want to after you hear this. First, what can you tell me about this Voldemort I've heard about? Is he really as bad as he sounds?"

"Oh yes, sir. He's a powerful, dark wizard who seems to like killing just for the fun of it. He is a horrible person and wizard. And he's on the rise, he has followers he calls the Death Eaters. He is so terrible many wizards and witches have resorted to calling him He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named." James replied in full seriousness.

"Dear, God. It's worse than I thought. Listen, I've never met any other man in Lily's life and I can tell that you care about her deeply. I think you might love her. But I need you to make me a promise. If she is ever in trouble, and I'm not there to protect her, I need you to promise to help her. Please, I know that with all this wizardry I'm most likely more a burden than a protector or provider now. Except when she needs money of course." He smiled at the last part. "I know that I won't be able to protect her the way I can protect Rhea and Petunia. I trust you. Please, look after her for me." He looked at James earnestly with an almost pleading look in his eyes.

"Sir, that is one promise I swear to fulfill till the day I die."

Lily ran up to her friends.

"Thank Merlin you guys are here. I don't know if I could have stood another SECOND alone with Potter," Lily nearly screamed when she reached them.

"We're glad to see you too, Lily," said Katy, embracing Lily in a hug.

"Anyways, wasn't it _you_ who invited_ him_ to your house for break?" Emma questioned.

"Only because I felt bad for him," Lily said.

"Suuuuuure. You are SO in love with him!" Katy squealed.

"Yeah, right. He is just lucky that he looks so pathetic when he cries or I would have kicked his pompous arse out of my house."

"Lily, he's walking over here," Emma whispered urgently.

"Oh crap, I hope he didn't hear you," Katy added, with a worried look across her face.

"I hope he _did_," Lily muttered. She said that but she knew that she really wished he hadn't heard her. No matter how angry she was, she didn't want him ever to know that she was giving him charity. She still didn't understand what had made her offer an invitation to James in the first place. Was it really just because she felt sorry for him? Anyway, if anyone besides Emma and Katy found out it was totally voluntary, her reputation for hating Potter would be ruined. She would be one of those dumb, bimbos who fell victim to the Potter charm. And privately she knew it would kill Potter to be taken in because of pity. But she would never admit that she was worried about _his _feelings.

Potter had heard a little but only the last bit.

"Sorry, I missed the first part… why would you have kicked my pompous arse out of your house?" James asked. He thought he was being flirtatious and witty. He was dead wrong. Not only that but he could sense an uncomfortable feeling in Lily. He was dumbfounded.

"Shut up, Potter. Like I would tell you. By the way, your totally wrong if you thought I would even _consider_ letting you sit in the same compartment as me and my friends," Lily retorted.

"Didn't you ever think I was just deigning my company on you?" James sneered. He instantly regretted it.

"Good. Well, hopefully I won't see you anytime soon!" Lily almost turned to board the train when Thomas showed up with her last luggage bag.

"Wow. So I guess you guys really don't get along very well," Thomas chuckled.

"Who told you we get along well? Potter drives me BONKERS!" Lily growled in frustration.

"Enough of Potter, sweetheart. Aren't you going to say good-bye to your old man?"

"Of course, Daddy," Lily responded while her Dad enveloped her in a huge hug.

"I love you so much, my Lily-flower." Thomas would never tell anyone but Lily was his favorite daughter. It ashamed him sometimes but other times, like these, he just felt proud. "Promise me, Lily, that you will stay safe. OK?" Lily was rather perplexed by the question. But she did comply.

"Sure, Dad." But she got the sense that he wasn't satisfied. "I promise I will stay safe. Is that good?" she added with a smile.

"Yes. Well, good-bye. I'll miss you." Thomas had a sad smile on his face.

"Bye, Daddy. I love you!" Lily reciprocated. But she no sooner said her last words than she was running to join Katy and Emma on the train. As the last whistle blew, Lily looked out the window and waved good-bye to her father until he was out of sight.

"So, Lily. Are you going to tell us what happened?" Katy asked. Emma just sighed. Couldn't Katy tell that this was not the right time? She was the over curious one, as always. Potter interrupted them by running into their compartment.

"Listen, Evans. I know that you're mad at me, but I just realized something. We didn't get any Head duties done!"

Lily took a second to comprehend what he meant. Katy and Emma didn't catch on so quickly.

"Dumbledore didn't say you needed to do any Head duties…" said Emma, looking at Lily.

"Until December 29th. I mean that's when we have to turn in our plans. We still have a couple of days." Lily interrupted Emma quickly. She just looked at Lily with a questioning gaze. Potter just glanced around suspiciously.

"Well then why did I have to come to your house?"

Lily was about to retort with a "You didn't _have_ to" when she realized that she had indeed made it sound like he _had_ to.

"Um. I wanted to get a head start but you saw how my family was. It was just too busy. We can work on it tomorrow. Good? Great. Ok well see you tonight." She rambled as she pushed Potter out of the compartment. Lily was just about to explain the whole scenario to her friends when Danny knocked on the door.

"Happy Christmas, Lily." He barely got those words out of his mouth before her lips were on his. Lily didn't know why she had kissed him. Maybe it was her recent encounter with Potter and her uncertain feelings toward him. No. It was probably just that she had missed Danny SO much. Yeah. That was it.

"Did you miss me as much as I missed you?" she offered as an explanation. She knew she sounded clingy but she couldn't think of anything else to say.

"Sure, Lils. Well, do you want to exchange presents now or later?"

HOLY FRICKIN BLOODY HELL! LILY HADN'T EVEN GOTTEN HER OWN PERFECT BOYFRIEND A CHRISTMAS GIFT!

"Um. Later. By the fire."

"Well, can I stay here or should I leave?"

Lily signed the distress signal to her friends. "Stay here." She was smiling and tapping her right hand thumb on her left forearm.

"Hey, Katy, what kind of tampons do you use?" Emma asked.

"Oh well it depends on how heavy my flow is that month." Katy responded with a smile.

"Hey, you know what? On the other hand, I just remembered this essay I have to have finished. I got to go. I'll see you at dinner," said Danny, obviously trying his hardest to escape this female prison.

"Sure. I love you, Danny."

"I love you, too."

After Danny had left, Lily started in on the thanks.

"I owe you guys. Seriously," Lily said.

"Aw. Come on. What are friends for?" Emma asked.

"What was the problem anyway?" Katy continued.

"I might of… um… er… forgotten to get Danny a present."

"LILY!" both girls screeched.

"Bloody hell, Lils. What are you going to do?" Katy asked.

"I have NO IDEA! What should I get him?" Lily responded with another question.

"Earth to Lily! He's _your_ boyfriend. Not ours," retorted Emma.

"Aw. Come on, guys. Just a little help," Lily pleaded.

"Emma's right, Lils. Sorry, but you should know him better… way better than we do," agreed Katy.

Lily was about to continue beseeching her friends for advice when her independent side kicked in.

"You're right. I'll be fine on my own."

As the train ride continued Katy and Emma chattered aimlessly, just discussing the events of their holiday. Lily, on the other hand, was lost in thought. As well she should be; she had much to think about. What should she get for her boyfriend for Christmas? How could she have forgotten to get him a present? Most importantly, how could she have forgotten to get Danny a present, but she got Potter a totally awesome one? Well, maybe it was because she had had to plan so far in advance for Potter's gift. She had to order all those pictures and then write letters to all the quidditch players asking for their autographs. Whoa. That was a _lot_ of time. Why did she do that? He's just another arrogant, mean, prat not to mention bloody gorgeous. Scratch that last comment, please. Back to her present predicament. What should she get Danny for Christmas? It's not even like she could get out to Hogsmeade. That would solve all her problems.

"Lily, you never told us what was going on with you and James. Are you going to… ever?" enquired Katy.

"Oh right. Ok, guys. You have to promise that you can't tell anyone. It would break Potter's heart."

Katy and Emma exchanged glances. They were so amazed that Lily was so wrapped up in hating James; she hadn't realized how much she cared for him. Lily caught them.

"Come on, do you want me to tell you or not?" she snapped.

"Tell, tell!"

"Well, I walked in on Potter in the Head common's… crying. This was the day before we left for Christmas Break. I asked him what was wrong and you will never guess what he told me. His whole family, his little sister and his parents, had been murdered over the summer by Voldemort. He was going to stay at Hogwarts while the rest of his friends all went home for Christmas. But he had no family to go home to. He was so sad, you guys. I invited him to come with me. But he wouldn't accept my charity so I had to tell him that Dumbledore told us we had to work together over Christmas on Head duties. And now I don't have anything to discuss with him. I really don't want him to find out," Lily finished.

Katy and Emma sat there with their mouths hanging. That was a LOT of information to take in. Two sides of their favorite couple they had never seen before. Lily's caring side for James and James' sensitive side… he CRIED! But they had to focus on Lily's present problem.

"A ball," resolved Emma.

"Yeah! A New Year's Eve Ball," added Katy with glee. "I love balls!"

"I don't know if Hogwarts has ever had a New Years Eve Ball before…" contemplated Lily.

"It would be fun and new," assured Emma.

"You know what? It's perfect! Thank you so much. You are the best mates ever!" exclaimed Lily finally.

And she had to get something for Emma and Katy. They had decided to all buy each other's presents at the next Hogsmeade trip, but Lily was a little suspicious that both Emma and Katy had gone behind her back to buy small gifts to tide her over until then. She had nothing for them either. Great. Just great. So what to get them?

"Lily? Lily Evans?" Emma was trying to bring Lily back from her own little world.

"What? Huh?" Lily looked around.

"We're almost at Hogwarts. Just thought you might like to put your robes on," Emma answered.

"Oh. Thanks," Lily mumbled. She reached up to her trunk and quickly slipped her cloak and Gryffindor scarf and gloves over her Muggle clothes just as the train was coming to a stop. She grabbed her trunk and stepped off the train alongside Emma and Katy. She breathed in the fresh air, marveled at the Hogwarts' grounds covered in blankets of snow. This was why she loved being a witch so much, you know, besides the magic and everything; Hogwarts, the beauty of her second home just astounded her.

"Come on, Lils," said Katy, interrupting Lily's train of thought with her words along with a snowball which promptly hit Lily in the head. Katy ran up to her two best friends, left her trunk behind her (to be picked up by the house elves), her cheeks flushed with the coldness of the air. She grabbed each of their hands, and they walked that way up to the Great Hall; friends forever through thick and thin.

Lily abruptly ruined the moment by pulling away from her two best friends… to catch up to none other than James Potter.


	5. The Punishment

"Do you see what I mean?" James immediately asked his friends as they sat down in their compartment. "I might have been completely misinterpreting her, but I definitely thought we had become friends! Now, she won't even talk to me!"

Sirius and Remus shared a quick glance. But they were both thinking completely different thoughts.

_Poor James. Lily should just give him a chance. Well, she does have a long time boyfriend_, thought Moony. Sirius wasn't exactly of the same mind.

_ONE GIRL! He gets himself all worked up for ONE GIRL. Damn, Lily. If I hear another word about Lily I might… well, I'll probably do nothing. But it is still really annoying_, thought Sirius.

"But she invited you to her house for Christmas, right? That should have been a good sign," voiced Remus finally.

"Yeah, but it was just because of Head duties. She probably would never have invited me over unless we had something to do."

"Oh. Well, what did you do?" asked Sirius.

"We… SIRIUS!" screamed James, suddenly jumping up from his seat.

"WHAT?" responded a suddenly startled Padfoot.

"WE DIDN'T DO ANYTHING!" screamed James.

"Duh. Sorry, Prongs, but it's not exactly like she's shown much of an interest in you in _that_ way," pointed out Sirius.

"Not that way, pinhead. We didn't do any Head duties. What is Dumbledore going to say?" James was no longer screaming, but looked no less panicked.

"James? James? LISTEN TO ME! Ok, calm down. Why don't you just ask Evans? I'm sure she knows exactly what's going on," rationalized Remus.

"Yeah, yeah. That's exactly what I'll do. Thanks, mate," beamed a suddenly relieved James. He promptly left his compartment and went to find Lily. Kind of. He already knew exactly where she was, technically. He burst into her compartment at a run.

"Listen, Evans. I know that you're mad at me, but I just realized something. We didn't get any Head duties done!"

Lily looked at him blankly for a second. But Emma said something before she could.

"Dumbledore didn't say you need to do any Head duties…" said Emma, looking at Lily.

"Until December 29th. I mean that's when we have to turn in our plans. We still have a couple of days." Lily interrupted Emma quickly.

This all sounded very… odd. He looked between Emma and Lily. Why did this seem so suspicious? He would just have to find out.

"Well then why did I have to come to your house?"

Lily took a second but then responded with what seemed to be a very logical answer.

"Um. I wanted to get a head start but you saw how my family was. It was just too busy. We can work on it tomorrow. Good? Great. Ok well see you tonight." She rambled as she pushed James out of the compartment.

Wow. Either Lily was madder at him that he thought she was… or she was lying. Both ideas seemed completely wrong. After this encounter with Lily, James spent the rest of the train ride to Hogwarts trying to figure out what was going on. Why was Lily angry with him? Why did that whole situation about their Head duties seem so… wrong? And if what Lily was saying was true, why would _Lily_, of all people, just deem it unnecessary to do their Head duties? And if it wasn't true, why was she lying to him?

_Who can tell me what's going on in my life, if I don't even know?_ thought James, rhetorically. But then he realized that there actually was someone!

As soon as the train halted, James bolted away from his friends. He almost ran into Lily, Emma and Katy walking hand-in-hand to the Great Hall. He almost stopped to try and find out what he did wrong with Lily in the first place. But he didn't. Not because he didn't want to rain on her parade, but he really needed to find someone.

Then James caught sight of exactly just who he was looking for. He was just ahead of Lily. James hurried to catch up with the man he was looking for.

"Excuse me, Professor Dumbledore?" said James, tapping on Dumbledore's arm.

Dumbledore stopped walking and turned around.

"Oh, hello, Mr. Potter. How was your Christmas break? I understand you spent it at Miss Evans home," said Professor Dumbledore, with his natural twinkle in his eyes.

"Actually, sir, that was what I need to talk to you about. Evans said that I had to come over to her house to discuss and work on Head duties with her," continued James.

"Well, that sounds like Miss Evans. Always taking initiative," added Dumbledore.

James stopped talking for a second. Dumbledore's answer didn't really seem to fit. Initiative? Did that mean Dumbledore _didn't_ tell her that they had to spend Christmas together?

"Is something wrong, Mr. Potter?"

"Well, you see, sir, I was just wondering if you by any chance told Evans that we _had _to work together over Christmas on Head duties," asked James, finally just asking the man himself instead of beating around the bush.

"I don't remember…" started Dumbledore, but he was almost immediately interrupted.

"What you told us to work on, sir? I'm pretty sure you asked us to plan something for New Year's Eve," continued Lily.

She had seen James talking to Professor Dumbledore and had automatically assumed the worse. It was a good thing, too, because they had been discussing exactly what Lily was afraid of. And Dumbledore had just been about to reveal Lily's secret.

"Remember, sir? Isn't that what I told you, Potter?" Lily was trying desperately to control the speed of her speech.

"I don't think you told me it was about New Years Eve," muttered James. He was both embarrassed and angry that Lily had caught him. Now he had to pretend he wasn't over here, cross-checking Lily and he would never find out if she was lying to him or not."Is that all you needed, Mr. Potter? I'm sure you could have just asked Miss Evans instead of asking me what you needed to go over. That is what you were asking, correct?" Dumbledore was giving him a way out! Merlin, you just have to love that man.

"Yes. Exactly. Thank you, sir. Well, I have to go eat dinner. Would you care to join me, Miss Evans?" James asked as sweetly as possible. He was defiantly going to try and get the best out of this situation.

_That PRAT!_ thought Lily, _I just prevented any hurt feelings and he has to be all "Would you care to join me, Miss Evans? UGH!_

Just as she was about to try and weasel her way out of her predicament, Dumbledore interject his plans.

"I'm sorry, Mr. Potter. I am afraid I need to see Miss Evans in my office immediately. I have some thing I have to discuss with her," said Dumbledore.

Lily was both relieved and anxious. Now she didn't have to join Potter. But what did Dumbledore need to talk with her about?

"I see. Well, I'll see you tonight than, Evans," said James. He seemed disappointed but even more curious.

"Miss Evans, follow me please," asked Dumbledore.

Lily followed Dumbledore up to his office. She knew his password (Twizzlers) well by now, because she and Potter had to go up to his office every month to check-up. But she had never been up there because she had been in trouble. Was she in trouble now? What could she have possibly done? What if she got demoted from being Head Girl? What if she got… expelled? They were now in Dumbledore's office, he was seated behind his giant desk. The "what if"s in her mind had to come to a halt.

"Now, if you will please explain what that was about," Dumbledore finally said, very nonchalantly. Lily exhaled. That was it? It was best he knew the whole story anyway. So she told him.

Dumbledore listened patiently. When Lily was done with her whole tale, he turned around to face the back wall. To Lily, it seemed that Dumbledore was just contemplating what she had done. In reality, his eyes were twinkling, and he was grinning broadly. She seemed to finally be giving the poor, love-struck boy a chance. When he eventually turned back around, the grin was gone but his eyes were still twinkling.

"Miss Evans, I'm afraid that I will have to give you a small punishment for lying in my name! In addition, I now need to prepare for a ball in a few days," he said.

"I'm sorry, sir. And I will make sure everything goes as well as possible!" promised Lily, earnestly. She had never gotten even one detention in seven years! And her spotless record was about to be ruined because she was nice to Potter!

"I need you to run an errand to Hogsmeade for me tonight. I need you to pick up a special bracelet from Jacqueline's Jewels. It is a Christmas present for a friend of mine. I'm not giving you a required time frame, but you may not tell anyone, not even Mr. Potter," said Dumbledore.

_Is this a reward or a punishment?_ thought Lily.

It didn't really matter. For the second time that night, Dumbledore had just saved her arse. Now she could get a quick present for Danny! Chocolate would be a quick present. Wait, not quick. She meant perfect. Some Honeyduke's chocolate would be perfect.

"Yes, sir. I promise. But um, er, sir? I was wondering if it would be at all possible, if you could not tell Potter that I lied to him?" asked Lily.

"I understand, Miss Evans. You have my word, I will not tell him. Thank you, Miss Evans. The bracelet should already be wrapped in a box and paper, so please just leave it on Professor McGonagall's desk," finished Dumbledore.

"Good night, Professor," said Lily as she left. She smiled to herself. Dumbledore was so sweet to so many people. He was such a great person, teacher, headmaster, and wizard.

_I hope I can grow up and be like Dumbledore_, thought Lily.

It would be nice to add: great wife, mother and healer to that list. And not a headmaster, of course. But she could accomplish everything in life that she wanted to without a husband. If she never found the _one_, she could just adopt a child. There were enough parents dieing everyday anyway. Maybe she could become a foster parent for those poor children. She could help them.

She could only do that if it didn't get in the way of her career. She had other responsibilities to attend to. She and Danny had talked about possibly getting married and having kids of their own; they would both have their own careers, but they could make it work. Sometimes Lily could see herself spending the rest of her life with Danny because it made her feel so safe to be in his arms. But he was so much like her… could they really live out the rest of their lives in harmony?

By this time she had reached Honeyduke's. It was time to begin the quest for the perfect chocolate for her perfect boyfriend.

"So, Miss, that will be one pound of mint-chocolate fudge and ½ a pound of coconut fudge?" asked the sales clerk.

"Yep. That sounds good," answered Lily.

"Would you like that wrapped in Christmas paper?" asked the witch.

"Yes, please. That would be fabulous!" beamed Lily.

She received the fudge, paid for it and left Honeyduke's feeling very satisfied. Now she just had to go to Jacqueline's Jewels, which was just across the street, and get McGonagall's gift from Dumbledore. That task was quickly completed. She looked out across the almost deserted small town of Hogsmeade. It was so quaint and lovely. She looked at her watch.

_It's 11:30. I really should be heading back,_ thought Lily.

But she wasn't really tired yet. And it was nice to be out here by herself. There was a hill just outside Hogsmeade that she loved to visit just to think sometimes. Now seemed like a great time to go there. It was her own special space. No one knew that she went up there, no one would ever find her there. It was Lily's Hill.

Lily traipsed out of Hogsmeade and up the hill. It was much steeper than Lily had realized. That was probably because she had never climbed it at night, when any melted snow had turned back to ice. By the time she got to the top of the hill, her watch had just struck midnight.

_This is so lovely_¸ thought Lily. She was enveloped by the black sky, littered with stars. The full moon was lighting up the otherwise dark village and the surrounding valleys and hills. Then just near the Enchanted Forest, she saw a light go off in a small, worn down shack that she had never noticed before.

Suddenly, she heard an ear piercing… sound. It was a mix between a cry and a howl. It sounded like something was getting hurt. She broke into a run towards whatever was hurt. It sounded like the noise had come from the suddenly lit up shack.

As Lily got closer to the structure, she could see shadowy figures in the windows. She rushed, as quietly as possible, to look into the window. She couldn't quite reach the window, so she moved a log over a tad bit to stand on it. But as soon as she should have been able to see inside the window, something was blocking her view. It seemed there was a huge, furry, gray chair in her line of vision. Suddenly the log flew out from under her feet. Without even thinking, Lily screamed.

As she fell to the ground, she glanced up. And she almost screamed again. Because she had been wrong when she had thought that a chair had been blocking her view. Dead wrong. And it was about to cost her her life.


	6. The Forbidden Forest

From the window, he looked down at her. Well, could you really call that werewolf a he? A werewolf is more of an it. Anyway, _it_ looked down at her. And as its empty hearted eyes bore into her, Lily knew she was going to die. She was expecting that at any moment she would see the normal "flash of scenes from her life" or feel regret for all she hadn't done or think about all the people she would miss. But she felt none of that, mostly because she was so frozen with fear, Lily expected even her blood had stopped cold.

All of the sudden, the werewolf beat on the window. This action jolted Lily enough that she got up and ran. Behind her, she heard a second beating on the window. This time she heard the glass shatter. She kept running as hard as she could. But she was no athlete, and soon she started feeling cramps, loosing her breath and her legs getting wobbly underneath her. Her clumsy feet tripped on a root just as she was entering the Forbidden Forest. She was quickly on her hands and knees.

_Why am I running?_ Lily thought as she fell through the air. _I'm going to die anyway. I might as well get it over with._

Lily got up just as fast as she had fallen. She got a sudden idea of how she might survive, but it was abruptly ruled out when she realized that, being the idiot she is, she had not brought her wand. So she stood there looking for a sign of the werewolf.

_It must of lost my scent! _

Lily rejoiced at the thought, but it was a premature celebration. The werewolf suddenly jumped only a few yards in front of her from behind a bush. It took a second for it to see her, but once it smelled the blood on Lily's hands, Lily knew she was done for.

She was right. The werewolf suddenly started bounding towards her. Lily's plan to just stand there and die failed when her brain shut off and instinct kicked in. And instinct screamed "GET AWAY!"

Seeing a nearby tree, Lily tried to jump into it. She had just scrambled onto the first branch when she felt a tug on her cloak. She looked down to see _it_ biting on her clothes, trying to pull her down. This was it. This was the end. She looked out towards Hogsmeade and about to scream for help, knowing full well that none was going to come.

But when she looked out she saw a stag and a huge black dog coming towards her. Actually, they were very close to her. She might live! Wait, these were animals. They would run away as soon as they realized what was happening. Or so she thought. As soon as they were close enough to do something –anything!- to save her. They both stopped… and looked at her.

Lily was still struggling. The werewolf had torn at her cloak and ripped out a huge patch of it. She was still trying to get higher in the tree, but she couldn't reach the next branch up. The stag and the dog looked at her, then the dog looked at the stag. But that stag just stared at Lily, blood running down her arms and legs, she had a huge gash on her cheek from the tree and the blood flowing down her face was mixed with tears and dirt, her pale skin was deadly white, her red hair was everywhere, she was desperately tearing at a tree trying to get up and a werewolf was biting at her ankles. But that stag did nothing to stop the werewolf. The dog gave up waiting for the stag and bolted full force at the werewolf.

The impact of the dog sent the werewolf to the ground. The two canine animals tore at each other. Lily seemed forgotten so she jumped down and ran into the Forbidden Forest. But she was mistaken. Lily was far from forgotten to that werewolf and he dashed after her. She couldn't contain her terror any longer. Lily screamed and screamed at the top of her lungs. This didn't help anything. It only helped the werewolf track her and made it harder for her to breathe. She stopped screaming but kept running. Lily didn't know where she was going. She was just moving as fast as she could.

She didn't know when she stopped hearing the running, panting and growling behind her, but that didn't stop her from running. Her whole body was screaming for her to stop but her fear kept her on the move. She finally gathered the strength to look behind her, and saw no one or nothing. She also didn't see the root in front of her and she tripped. Her mind told her to get up, but as soon as she was on her feet again, her whole body collapsed under her.

Lily just lay there sprawled out on the ground for a moment. Her mind was numb and her body was in so much pain. Some blood drizzled in her eye and as she moved to wipe it away, she realized maybe lying on the ground with your face in the dirt in the middle of the Forbidden Forest wasn't such a great idea. Although she was in so much pain, and she had already done it once that night, she climbed up into a tree. This time she had time to choose an easier tree to climb. As soon as she had picked and climbed to a safe spot, she sat up with her back resting on the trunk. She was just about to relax when she heard voices.

"He would much appreciate your assistance. You see, Muggles are not like us. They are oblivious, naïve and incompetent to do anything of any worth. We need to get rid of them so that our own race may be more able to do great things."

By the end of this little speech, Lily had silently moved closer to the end of the branch until she could see the situation. A wizard was talking to a centaur.

"I do see, Malfoy. I see more than you know. Look at the stars. You see twinkling lights. I see a power rising, a Dark power," the centaur responded.

"I don't need to look at the stars to know that a power is rising. The Dark Lord will soon have more control than any other wizard there ever has been or ever will be," said Malfoy with great annoyance in his voice.

"I also see other things," said the centaur, as calm as Malfoy was annoyed. He continued looking at the stars. Lily guessed that he was thinking as well as star gazing. Finally, he spoke.

"Tell your Master that the centaurs will _not _join him."

"Are you serious?" Malfoy sneered. "Do you know what opportunity you are passing up?"

"Centaurs are not naturally evil creatures and we will not promote it." The centaur was as calm as ever.

"It's not about evil. It's about _power_."

"That is what you believe. But the only power you are increasing is the power of Voldemort."

"Oh, really? How about I show you some of my power?" Malfoy whispered menacingly.

"I am more than willing to sacrifice myself for the better of my centaurs and the world."

Lily was so amazed with this centaur's bravery. But she was also very sad. And angry. And confused! But whatever was going on, she didn't like it one bit!

"Your highness?" suddenly another centaur came out from behind a bush. "Oh! I'm sorry, am I interrupting something?" This centaur was much younger than the other centaur who Lily now assumed was the king.

"Actually, we were just getting started," Malfoy growled. He suddenly drew his wand from his cloak.

"Don't touch him!" the king centaur's voice boomed through the forest. Malfoy was only momentarily affected.

"Join us. Join the Dark Lord. Join the winning team," said Malfoy.

"Never." This time the calm voice was coming not from the king, but the young centaur. The king looked torn. Lily almost started crying.

"Well, what will it be?" No voice responded. "Maybe this will speed up your decision process. CRUTIO!"

A scream pierced the air. It was filled with pain. Lily could almost feel his pain in her own body, and then she realized that she was just feeling her own pain in her own body. She couldn't imagine how the young centaur must feel. This time she did start to cry.

"STOP!" the king yelled.

"You can make it stop now. Just join us."

The king looked at the young centaur. "I'm sorry," he whispered. "No. As long as I am king, the centaurs will never join Lord Voldemort," he spoke, with fierce passion.

"Fine. I will just have to kill you once I'm done with this one. AVADA"

Lily didn't know how she did it. She didn't know where she summoned the courage or when her brain finally clicked on. But when that click happened she realized that from the little wandless magic she could do, there was one wandless spell she could do with confidence that could solve this situation.

"ACCIO MALFOY'S WAND!" The wand flew out from the wizard's hand and into Lily's. Malfoy was startled. The centaur king, however, took the opportunity to lunge toward Malfoy and promptly reared and knocked Malfoy out with his front hooves. Lily dropped the wand to the ground and climbed down the tree to see if she could help the young centaur. It was a pretty long climb down and the whole time she was thinking about what had just happened and all that had happened that night. Once her feet touched the ground, Lily broke down sobbing. She fell in a heap on the ground and cried her heart out until she fell into such a deep sleep, one might think she was unconscious.

_Oh, Merlin_, thought James. He looked at Lily in the tree, saw her in danger. He had a chance to be her knight in shinning armor. And he froze. She thought she was going to die. He could see it in her eyes. And he thought he was going to die right alongside her. The prospect of her dieing was unbearable.

Finally Sirius helped her. He saved her. He did what James _should_ have done. As soon as Lily, Remus and Sirius were out of sight, James turned back into himself. He sat in the grass and got lost in thought, gazing into the Forbidden Forest. He was going to let her die. He was going to let her die at the hand of an uncontrollable beast. What if Sirius hadn't been there? How long would he have just stood there? Long enough for Lily to either be bitten and become a werewolf herself or perish.

What kind of person was he? He said he loved her. He told everyone. Told the world. But what kind of person let the object of their love die right in front of them, without trying to stop it? And now he was just sitting there feeling sorry for himself. And Lily, his Lily, was fighting for her life in the Forbidden Forest, were a werewolf wasn't the worse thing you could run into, and he was here; feeling sorry for himself. But as hard as James tried, he could not move himself from that spot. He sat there all night.

Eventually, the moon set. Now at least James had a reason to wait. Remus, Sirius and Lily should all be coming out any second. Just as he was thinking that, he heard a rustle in the bushes. A beaten up Sirius and Remus practically crawled on all fours out. James finally stood up and rushed over to them.

"Where's Lily?" he asked immediately.

"She hasn't come out?" asked Sirius.

"I thought you might have knocked Remus out or something and helped her," responded James. "When was the last time you saw her?"

"I only saw her for about five minutes once we got into the Forest."

"What should I do? She could be in major trouble! She could be hurt! Or she could be…" James trailed off. He had been thinking about Lily dieing all night but he still couldn't bring himself to say it out loud.

"I'm sure she's fine, mate," Sirius assured his best friend. "Lily's got a smart head on her shoulders."

"Yeah, she does," agreed James. But he was still worried. Before he had been frozen in fear of loosing her, but now all he could think about was finding Lily, making sure she was ok. "But I don't know what I should do! Should I go get Dumbledore? Should I wait here incase she comes out and needs help? Should I try to go find her?" James was near hysterical.

"James. First of all, you have to calm down. For Lily, if not for the rest of us. Come on, we're the Marauders. We can think of something to do. OK. For your idea about going into the Forest, not even _I_ know my way around there. Getting you lost in the Forest won't help anyone. I don't think you should wait here either. Remus needs to get to hospital wing soon."

At this comment both boys looked at their friend who smiled weakly at them. He looked horrible.

"I'm not exactly in the best shape to practically carry him back to the castle," continued Sirius. "So I think you should take him and then go to Dumbledore. I'll sit here and wait for Lily and try to transfigure some of these leaves into bandages."

James was too indecisive to do anything but agree with Sirius. He helped Remus off the ground and pulled Remus' arm around his own shoulders. In this way they walked back to the castle, along the way passing a forgotten bag of chocolates and a wrapped box.

_Bloody girl_, thought Sirius while transfiguring leaves into bandages, _How does one girl manage to cause so much trouble… without meaning to?_

But Sirius was worried. Lily wasn't one for getting in trouble so consequently this was probably her first time in the Forbidden Forest. And she was by herself. And probably hurt. She could be de… no. She was fine. He had convinced James that Lily was alive and well, he _had_ to believe himself.

But how was anyone going to help her? No one knew where she could possibly be. As much as it pained him, Sirius tried to think of ways Mr. Potter had found people. Mr. Potter had been an auror so this was part of his job. But thinking about Mr. Potter and the fact that he was dead was almost too much to bear. Suddenly, Sirius remembered a way that would be quite easy for him to do.

Sirius reached into his cloak pocket and pulled out a two-way mirror.

"James? James, can you hear me?" James' face suddenly appeared in the mirror instead of Sirius'.

"Yeah. What's up?" James replied. He sounded calm but his gray face and panic-stricken eyes quickly revealed his true feelings at the moment.

"I just remembered a way to find people. Usually just Muggles do it. They use a dog to search for a person with their noses. I just need something that Lily recently had."

"That's brilliant! Good thinking, Padfoot. I saw a bag left right outside the Shrieking Shack. It must have been hers. You can use that. Do you still want me to get Dumbledore?" James rambled.

"No. Not unless it's absolutely necessary. I'm gonna go. See ya soon." Then Sirius took the mirror and put it back into his cloak. In the blink of an eye, Sirius was gone and a huge black dog stood in his place.

Padfoot ran to the Shrieking Shack and found the bag that James had described. He took a long whiff of it and suddenly he could smell the scent everywhere. He ran towards the Forbidden Forest. There the scent was again. No not there. Ok there. And this was how Padfoot kept moving for a half hour. He moved at top speed until he found her. Lily was sprawled out on the ground. She wasn't moving. Padfoot couldn't even tell if Lily was breathing. He bolted towards her. He nudged her with his huge nose. No response. He did it again. Still no response. He pushed her hard with his head until she rolled over onto her back. At least her eyes were closed. Her poor face was covered with dirt and blood and tears. Padfoot did the first thing that came to his rather dog possessed mind. He started licking her face.

The next thing Lily felt after she fell asleep was a dog tongue all over her face.

"Beast! Stop it!" she giggled. She opened her eyes and sat up. The dog licking her suddenly stood up and wagged its tail feverishly, panting heavily. It wasn't until Lily actually looked into the eyes of the dog that she realized it was not Beast… but possibly A beast. The "dog" had very humanlike eyes… eyes she almost recognized.

She stood up quickly and started backing up, but the dog followed her.

"Who are you?" she asked, her voice no longer filled with playfulness but with threatening.

"Ruff!" was her only reply.

Lily's back hit a tree and she was again filled with fear. But this time she put herself in check. There had been too much fear for one night; too much fear and not enough fight.

"Listen! If you're a wizard, show yourself!" she yelled. This time her reply was a little better. The dog jumped on her, pulling her to the ground and started to wrestle with her. But Lily could tell that this was just a game and not actually an attack. She burst out laughing.

It felt so good to laugh.

After playing around with her for a long time, the black dog started tugging on her cloak sleeve. He seemed to be pulling her somewhere. Lily hesitated.

"Where are you taking me?" she asked. She was not really expecting a reply, but a part of her thought that she might get one. Suddenly she heard a rustling behind her. She turned around but not quickly enough.

"Don't move," the previously unconscious wizard threatened. Lily didn't even move a muscle. She didn't know if Malfoy had his wand back but she was sure he didn't need it to kill her. Her back was still turned to Malfoy so she glanced sideways toward the dog. He was slowly slinking away.

_Thanks a lot, _Lily thought.

But she was almost greatful. It had been a long night. She had almost died and had undergone severe extremes of a multitude of emotions in a short period of time. She was tired. She was done. This "Malfoy" character could kill her right now and she might even put in a good word for him at the Pearly Gates. Lily gave up.

"So who may I ask are you?" Malfoy sneered. "Who are you that you dare interfere in the work of the Dark Lord?"

Lily's courage was gone. "Lily Evans, sir," she answered meekly.

"Ah, Miss Evans. I don't recall any families with the name Evans," he continued.

"I'm Muggle born, sir," Lily replied.

"Perfect. Now the Dark Lord will be especially happy I disposed of such dirty blood," Malfoy jeered. "Your stupid mother will probably mourn and your incompetent father will probably try to find who killed you, but no one will ever know. We are out in the middle of the Forbidden Forest. This is where you are going to die. Your disgusting family might not even ever find your body. What a shame."

Her family. Her mum. Her dad. Petunia. They loved her. They wanted her to live. If she couldn't live for herself, she could live for the people she loved. James. What? Why did she think of James? No matter. Now was not time to wage war on herself. How could she save herself? That was the question. And she had to hurry, Malfoy was walking toward her, she could hear his footsteps.

The next thing she heard didn't kill her but it might as well have.

"CRUCIO!" Lily wasn't expecting the curse but she somehow found it in her head to resist as strongly as she could.

_He can't make me feel pain. He can't do that. I'm me. _ She kept repeating her mantra in her head. Her body was shaking but she wasn't feeling pain. There was sweat dripping from her forehead, but she was OK. Suddenly for some reason she didn't know, Lily lost her concentration. Her body doubled over in pain and she began screaming. The pain ran through her body. She felt like she was being lit on fire, electrocuted and beaten up all at the same time.

"JUST KILL ME!" was the only thing that could escape her lips. It was all she could think through the intense pain. She strived to open her eyes for one last look at the world and saw a blur of black. And then the pain was gone and she fell to the ground.

Lily opened her eyes. The blinding whiteness of the Hospital Wing made her instantly shut them again. She heard voices so she tried opening her eye again. This time a little bit more slowly. As her eyes adjusted to the light, familiar faces came into focus around her.

"Lily…" she heard someone say. Whoever it was spoke barely above a whisper.

Then more loudly another voice, "Oh LILY!"

Emma and Katy were right there; their faces were full of joy.

"Madam Pomfrey said you were going to be ok…. But we still weren't sure," Katy rambled.

"But you ARE ok," Emma said, a little more calmly.

Lily tried to sit up, but immediately fell back down. "Well, I will be," she said with a wince. "So how long have I been out?"

"Two days," responded Katy.

The three girls continued on with their gabbing; Emma and Katy were filling Lily on all that happened for the past couple of days, most of it concerning her.

"No one knew what happened to you. Madam Pomfrey even said that you were just left here, on one of the beds, in the middle of the night. It's all very mysterious, Lily," Emma said.

There was a silence, not awkward but thick with ambiguity. The silence was ended with a loud growl from Lily's stomach. The girls laughed nervously.

"We're gonna go get you some food from the kitchens," Katy told Lily. "Madam Pomfrey might kill us, but it sounds like your stomach might eat you so we'll be fast."

"We'll be right back," agreed Emma.

The two friends rushed out of the hospital wing, passing a shadow in the corner they didn't notice. James had been sitting there ever since he had brought Lily back from the Forbidden Forest. He would never tell her that, of course. He would never tell her that he had gone numb when he saw her dead-like body on Padfoot's back. He would never tell her that when Sirius had morphed back into a human and told James that Lily was alive, he had tears in his eyes. He would never tell Lily that he had held her body tightly to his as he had carried her from the edge of the Forbidden Forest. Or that her subconscious self had held onto him almost as tightly as he held her. He would not tell her that he had sat up without sleep and eating only the food Sirius and Remus brought him for two days… waiting for her to wake up. He would never tell her that almost overwhelming sense of joy he felt when he heard her voice on the other side of the curtain.

James stood up and straightened himself out. He rubbed his face so as not to seem so sleep deprived and went to see her.


	7. Recovery

"Hey, Evans," James said, walking into the hospital wing with a smile on his face. He evidently had forgotten that when he had last spoken to Lily she was livid with him.

"What do _you_ want, Potter?" she spat. She was the last person in the world who would show her vulnerability while lying in a hospital bed.

James was taken aback. "Um, I was just coming up this way and ran into Katy and Emma. They told me you were awake so I came to see how you were doing," he explained.

"I'm fine," Lily said evenly. She tried to sit up to show him how "fine" she really was. She gathered all her strength and sat up. She tried her hardest not to wince from the soreness in her body and prayed that James wouldn't notice. But of course he did. And when she fell back down on her pillow, he had to mentally super-glue his feet to the ground to keep from catching her.

_Where were these impulses when she was getting attacked?_ he thought guiltily.

"See, I'm fine. Now unless there's something else you need…" she said, trying to push him away from her physically and mentally unstable self. Because, all though she was physically and mentally vulnerable, she was _not_ emotionally vulnerable. Or so she thought.

"Yeah, you should probably get your rest," James said dejectedly. "Get better soon." But as he was just about to leave the door…

"Wait! Potter!" Lily called.

This was it. Lily was going to tell him that all she could think about while she was dying was James and she was going to proclaim her love for him.

"Can you bring up the Head paperwork? While I'm up here I might as well record the points taken and given and the detentions given by the prefects."

That was definitely not what he was expecting.

"Oh! And if you see Danny, could you tell him I want to see him?" she added.

Way to kick him while he's down, Lily.

"Sure, Evans. Well, goodnight," he joked, trying to lighten his mood.

"Sleep tight," she replied with a yawn.

"Don't let the bed bugs bite," he chuckled as he walked out the door. But if he had turned around he would have caught Lily immediately sit upright, stare at him quizzically and then fall back down in pain.

"Lily?" she heard someone call. Lily turned her head. Emma walked in carrying a platter of random food.

"Hey. Where'd Katy go?" Lily asked.

"We ran into Remus on the way to the kitchens and he asked to talk to her… _alone_" Emma replied, implying that Remus and Katy alone could lead to "frivolous activity."

Lily sighed. Katy was boy crazy sure, but Emma knew that Katy and Remus weren't into each other that way. Actually if Lily thought about it, Katy would be much better suited for Sirius out of all the Marauders. They were both loud and funny. They loved to flirt (although Sirius usually took it further than Katy ever did) and loved to have fun. They were happy-go lucky people.

And Emma herself would be better suited for Remus. He was quiet and calm, just like Emma. They were both happy people, but a much more silent sort of happy than the happiness expressed by Sirius and Katy. And while Sirius and Katy were both very smart, Remus and Emma were harder workers.

Of course, if Emma started dating Remus and Katy started dating Sirius, Lily would have to spend more time with the Marauders and the only two left would be Peter and James. Lily couldn't really decide which boy was worse right now.

"You know, if you don't like the food, you don't have to eat it," remarked Emma.

"Why wouldn't I like it or eat it? I'm starving!" Lily exclaimed.

"Well, you've just been staring at if for the past couple of minutes and just a second ago you had a pretty grossed out look on your face."

"I was thinking of Peter and Potter," laughed Lily, "Not that delicious food."

"Good. I'll be right back," said Emma suddenly. When she came back she had tons of pillows and propped Lily up with them. Lily was immensely grateful. The two friends laughed and talked and ate and ate some more, both glad to just be in the other's company.

"She's okay, Remus. Don't worry," Katy said immediately. She knew that was exactly why Remus had pulled her away from Emma.

"Thank Merlin," murmured a very stressed Remus. He was so angry with himself. He hated being a werewolf. He hated causing people pain or agony. He, once more, felt grateful he had friends like James, Sirius and Peter.

Katy could see the pain etched on Remus' face. She instinctively hugged him.

"It's not your fault," she whispered. But he immediately pulled away.

"OF COURSE IT IS!" he yelled. Katy cringed. Remus had never yelled or even raised his voice at her before.

"Sorry," he said, more quietly. "But how could this possibly not be my fault? Was it someone else who chased Lily into the Forbidden Forest? Was that another person trying to kill her?"

"Yes, Remus, it was! You know you have no control over yourself when you're a werewolf. You were not trying to purposely kill her that night. That was a whole other… being," Katy said, trying to convince him; trying to help him. Katy had known Remus was a werewolf since 3rd year. She had been very interested in the nicknames of the Marauders and tried to figure them out. She couldn't figure out the other boys', but she finally got Remus'. And once she told him she knew and wouldn't tell anyone else, Remus told her about the other boys and their animagus forms. But they didn't know that she knew.

"What if James and Sirius hadn't been there? What if I had killed her?" he whispered. "I don't know what I would do with myself…"

"Don't talk like that! It doesn't even matter. They were there and they always will be. You don't have to worry, Remus. We all care about you and we won't ever let something like that happen," Katy said.

Remus looked at her. Although she was the only one of his friends who knew about his other self and was not an animagus, she offered something his other friends couldn't, being guys. She was sensitive and somehow understood what was going on in his head. He was so grateful to have the people in his life that he did, but thinking about that luck and what a horrible "thing" he became just made him feel more guilty.

"I got to go. Thanks for telling me she was ok," Remus said, turning away.

"Hey, Remus," Katy said, grabbing his shoulder. "If you ever need me, I'm here for you." She smiled as he left and went to go eat with Emma and Lily.

The three girls laughter in the hospital wing was suddenly interrupted when Dumbledore walked in.

"Hello, sir," greeted Emma with a smile.

"Good afternoon, Miss Rogers," he replied, "and to you as well, Miss LeCompte," he added looking at Katy.

"Hullo, Professor," said Katy. "I expect you're here to speak to Lily. Come on, Emma, let's go."

"Bye, Lils," she said giving Lily a hug.

"Ta-ta, Love!" giggled Katy as she blew a kiss to her while skipping out of the room.

Lily sighed contently. "Bye, guys," she called after them.

"Those are two great friends, Miss Evans," Dumbledore remarked after Emma and Katy were long gone.

"Yeah. I know," she said with a smile.

"Ok. Down to business," Dumbledore started.

"I'm so sorry, sir! But I'm afraid I lost it!" Lily blurted out.

"What?" said a completely confused Dumbledore.

"Your present for Professor McGonagall. I left it by the house by the Forbidden Forest," Lily confessed. She lowered her head in shame.

"Lily, Lily," Dumbledore chuckled while lifting her head up, "Your safety and well being is much more important to me than a bracelet. I'm sure Minerva will understand. But what I have to ask you to do, Lily, is very difficult. I need to you to tell me everything you remember from two nights ago after you left my office."

Lily took a deep breath. She had been mentally preparing herself for telling the story all day. So she began. She blushed from embarrassment when telling about buying a belated Christmas present for her boyfriend. She rushed through being attacked by the werewolf so much that Dumbledore asked her to slow down. She forgot parts and had to go back to them. And she shed a few tears when describing watching the torture of the young centaur. At the end, Dumbledore thanked her; made sure he got the name of the horrible wizard correct and left.

By the time she was done telling her story, Lily was exhausted and sad. She leaned against her pillow and turned her cheek to feel the coolness of the unused half of the pillow on her cheek. She sighed and snuggled herself warmly under the blankets. Dumbledore had turned out the lights and suddenly she felt extremely safe. All of the sadness she had felt only moments before turned into a feeling of security and calmness. At the exact same time, James entered the room and sat in the little corner where he had been sitting for the past couple of days. After Lily fell asleep, James watched her. Suddenly, he walked up to her bedside. She was so peaceful, lying on her side with half of her face on the pillow.

"I'm so, so sorry," he whispered. Slowly, he bent down and kissed her smooth cheek. Then he finally left to go get some sleep himself.

It was 3 o'clock in the morning and the whole castle was asleep. The whole castle, that is, except for two seventh years in their respective beds. One lay tossing and turning, falling asleep and then waking back up from his nightmares, nightmares of his horrible actions that haunted him when he was awake and when he was asleep. The other lay calmly awake. She thought of her friends and of their actions. She recalled her intense worry for one of them and her pity for the other. As she lay there, she decided she would rather be in front of a warm fire instead of in the frigid dormitories. She took her blanket off her bed, wrapped herself in it and walked down the stairs to the Gryffindor commons as it trailed behind her like a cape.

At the sound of someone downstairs, the other decided that he would rather be in the company of anyone else other than his tormented mind. But being inside his own mind so much he forgot how cold it was, he forgot to bring his own blanket. Down in the commons, he immediately recognized the girl staring into the fire and thought _'Just who I wanted to see.'_ She looked up when she heard him walking down the cold stone steps.

"Oh hey, Remus," she greeted him with a smile.

"Hey, Katy," he replied.

"What are you doing up?" she asked out of curiosity.

"I guess I could be asking you the same question, but I just couldn't sleep," he confessed.

"Same here. So why did you come down?" she asked.

"I heard you down here."

"How could you possibly have known it was me?"

"I didn't. I would just rather be with anyone than myself right now."

Katy looked at him, unsure of how to respond to that. She patted the seat next to her on the couch. "Come. Sit next to me," was all that came to her. Numbly, Remus did as he was told.

"Do you want to talk about it? Some more, I mean," Katy asked, correcting herself.

"No. Not anymore. I just want to get over it," Remus replied monotonically.

"Um. Ok. Well, how were your classes today?" Katy continued.

"Ugh," Remus sighed. "Never mind. Mindless talking isn't going to help anything. I don't think I'll be actually ok until Lily is out of the hospital wing."

Remus looked so depressed; Katy didn't know what to do. Then she remembered her mum.

"I have an idea to make you feel better. My mum used to do this to me all the time before I came to Hogwarts. Actually to tell you the truth, she still does it when I'm upset at home. Lay down with your head in my lap," she instructed.

Remus hesitated but did as he was directed. Once he was settled, Katy started stroking his head with her fingers and playing with his hair. At first, both Remus and Katy felt kind of awkward. But as she continued, Remus felt more and more comforted and Katy, feeling him at ease, relaxed too. Remus gave himself over to the feeling of Katy's fingers combing through his hair as if he was a child, knowing nothing of the cold face of the real world, only the comforting touch of a mother.

The next thing Katy knew she was waking up in the commons with a sleeping Remus in her lap. She looked down at him and noticed that his face was no longer tired and upset but relaxed and peaceful. She smiled to herself and knew that she had done him good.

"Hey, sleepy head," she said, nudging Remus awake.

For a second he was disoriented, until he realized, with some embarrassment, that he had fallen asleep on Katy's lap. He sat up abruptly as his face turned a slight red.

"Sorry, Katy. Didn't mean to keep you here all night," Remus muttered almost incoherently.

Katy smiled. Remus was so cute when he got flustered like this, which was pretty often considering he was so shy.

"It's no problem. Remember? I'm always here if you need me. That's what friends are for," she reminded him.

"Thanks, Katy. For everything," Remus told her sincerely.

"You're welcome. Now, if you don't mind I'm going to go shower," she said with a smile.

"See you later," Remus said as she went up the stairs.

He left the common room and went to his own dormitory. Something Katy had done last night made him feel better. Was it something she said? Or was it seriously just her combing her fingers through his hair? But he suddenly knew what it was that made him feel so much better. It was exactly what Katy had said it was. It was that he knew she was there for him, even while he was going crazy. While he was waging war on himself, she was trying to stop the fight. She knew best, there was no doubt in his mind.

He opened the door to his dormitory to find, with no surprise, that at 40 minutes until the start of class, not one of his mates was up yet. Usually James was a relatively early riser. But he had been having some well… issues lately.

"GOOD MORNING!" Remus yelled. Both Peter and James nearly jumped out of their beds. Sirius, being Sirius, just covered his head with his pillow.

"Come on, Siri," Remus reprimanded. "You have to get up if you're going to shower."

"Maybe I won't shower," mumbled Sirius through the pillow.

"Ha. Well, I know you're a fairly good looker but honestly, Sirius, you think you can get girls smelling like that?" laughed James.

"Heeeeyyy. I don't smell!" exclaimed Sirius. He could stand being yelled at but a blow to his ego, no matter how big it was, was too much to handle. He jumped up to smother James with a pillow, but James jumped up before Sirius could get to him.

"I call first shower!" he said running towards the bathroom.

"Um… I DON'T THINK SO!" shouted Remus, who was already standing by the bathroom door. He opened it, dashed in and locked the door behind him. This swift action was followed by a loud thud as James ran into the door. Remus smiled to himself and turned on the water. His friends were all that mattered to him. If it weren't for them, he'd probably be in some deep pit of depression by himself. But they reminded him what having fun and living life was all about. They got him through every day.

Once again, the blinding whiteness of the hospital wing awakened her. Lily's hand immediately went to her cheek and she smiled, filled with a happiness that seemed to give her energy to sit up. Before she could even think of what had caused this sudden burst of joy, Danny walked in.

"LILY! How are you feeling?" he exclaimed, quickly giving her a tight squeeze she readily returned. It felt so good to be in his arms, but the embrace felt somehow different than the last hug she remembered.

_That doesn't even make sense! How can a hug feel different?_ she thought.

But it did. It somehow seemed less intimate… less loving than this "phantom hug." She brushed the idea from her mind.

"I'm good. Good? I'm great!" she replied with a big smile. "How are you?"

"Good… good. School has been tough, like always," he said with a grin on his face. Lily felt a fleeting emotion of… was that disappointment… surge through her. Contrary to her independent nature, Lily had wanted to hear that Danny had been by her bedside; that his days had been torture waiting to see if she was going to be ok. But that feeling vanished almost as fast as it had come.

"So, I heard from Katy and Emma that you're still planning on having the New Year's Eve. Is that true?" Danny asked.

"Well, yeah. Why wouldn't I?" she responded. She expected him to say _Well, jeez, Lily! You were attacked by a werewolf AND the cruciatus curse! You should be getting sleep!_ That wasn't exactly his reaction.

"That's exactly what I thought you should do. No need to ruin other students holidays," he said with a loving smile towards his seemingly brave and tough girlfriend.

"Well, I better run. I've got to get to class. Bye, Lils," he said while leaving a chaste kiss on her forehead.

"Bye, Danny," she answered, feeling somewhat dejected. But just as she was about to go back to sleep, a bunch of people entering the hospital wing aroused her again.

"YOU CANNOT ALL GO IN TO SEE MISS EVANS! SHE IS RESTING!" bellowed Madame Pomfrey. But all the people seemed to ignore her.

"Aw, come on. It's just for a second because we don't want to be late for classes now do we?" Lily heard a sickeningly sweet Sirius plead.

"Well, I guess not. Make it fast," agreed Madame Pomfrey finally.

"LILY!" he yelled, rushing toward the red-head to give her a bear hug.

"Hey, Sirius," Lily laughed. "Hey, guys. What are you all doing here?"

"We came to see you before classes start," answered Emma.

"Yeah, we didn't know that James, Peter, Sirius and Remus would want to come too, but apparently they did," continued Katy.

"How come both James' AND Peters' names come before mine?" Sirius whined.

"Because they're more important than you," Emma countered.

"Well, then how come I'm last?" asked Remus.

"You're right, Remus! What a silly mistake. Sorry, Lily, I _meant_ to say that James, Peter, _Remus_ and Sirius wanted to come up with us," Katy corrected.

"James and Peter are still ahead of me," Remus whined.

"Don't push you luck," Katy warned with a smile.

"Never mind," Remus mumbled, but he had a huge grin on his face.

"Aaaannnddd," James added, "We brought you up some DELICIOUS food!"

He pulled a platter that held fruit, toast and tea out from behind his back. Everyone could tell that at that moment, Lily only cared about the food.

"Thanks, guys," she said, in-between mouthfuls.

"It was all, James," Remus told her. Great. So now Lily had to thank James, individually.

"Oh. Er. Thanks, Potter," she muttered.

"No problem," he answered. But much to Lily's surprise, James didn't add his usual cocky smile or even smile at all. Just a regular "No problem." And for some reason, this disturbed her.

"So do you know when you'll be out of the hospital wing?" asked Peter.

"I think I'll be out later today. I'm feeling much better!" she replied with a grin.

"Awesome!" exclaimed Emma.

"OK, well, we better be off… classes and all," mumbled James.

"Yeah. Bye, Lils!" said Katy, blowing Lily another kiss.

"Hey, Katy! Just so you know… you can _blow_ me a kiss ANYTIME!" called Sirius after her.

"I better catch Sirius before he gets castrated," called Remus, while running after Sirius.

"I'll see you after classes, Lily," said Emma, waving good-bye.

James was left a lone in the room with Lily. "Here, I brought you the records you asked for," said James submissively.

"Thanks, Potter. Well, I guess you better head off to class as well," said Lily.

"Yeah. Right. Well, bye," he said. And then he was gone.

"Oi, Prongsie," whispered Sirius during Potions class. James glanced over at him and noticed Sirius was trying to pass him a note. It seemed odd to James, considering Sirius just usually spoke (often very loudly) during class if he needed to tell James anything.

James stretched his arms up and yawned. As he brought his arms back down, he grabbed the note from Sirius' hand. Even more odd, the note had his name written on it in pretty handwriting, not Sirius', or Remus' or Peter's for that matter, normal chicken scratch. He opened the note in his lap.

_Hey James!_

_I heard about this New Year's Eve Ball you and Lily Evans are planning. I don't know if you have to go with her, but I thought I might as well ask you before any other girl did. I've kind of liked you for a while now, and I was wondering if you like to come with me to the New Year's Eve Ball. _

_-Caitlin Maxwell_

James stared at the note. He hadn't really thought of inviting anyone to the Ball. For some reason he had just expected to go with Lily, which was stupid considering she had a boyfriend.

_Why not?_ James thought. _It's not like I actually have a chance with Lily. I might as well just get over her. Or try to…_

And Caitlin was not a bad choice either. She was a curvy, tall brunette with long legs and a beautiful smile. James looked over at her, expecting her to be staring at him instead of paying attention to the class, which she actually was. So not only was she hot, she was apparently smart as well. James could see himself getting along well with Caitlin, instead of the constant fighting he had been enduring from Lily recently.

_Hey Caitlin,_

_I would love to go to the Ball with you. I'll talk to you after class._

_- James _

James folded up the note, wrote Caitlin's name on the front and gave it to Sirius. The first stage to recovering and getting over Lily would be to get into someone else.


	8. Back to Normal Or Not

That afternoon, Lily walked out of the Hospital Wing to join Emma and Katy in Advanced Potions. She was extremely happy to be going back to her normal life, or as normal as it could ever get. She just wanted to sit next to Emma and Katy and learn Potions… or make fun of Snape. But she soon realized that was not going to possible. As soon as she walked into the classroom, all the meaningless talking that was taking place before class began abruptly stopped. All eyes were now looking at Lily. She stood still for a second, looked for Emma and Katy, saw that neither one of them was there yet, and bolted out of the room.

James saw the whole thing. He sat motionless, not knowing what to do. Should he run after her? Or would she just hate him even more? But before James could even make a decision, Remus rushed out of the room to follow Lily.

"Lily?" he questioned when he saw her slumped against the wall, sitting on the floor.

"What?" she harshly retorted before looking up. "Oh, Remus, it's only you. Sorry," she corrected herself once she had seen who was talking to her.

"What's wrong?" he asked, sitting next to her.

"Didn't you see that? Was I just imagining that everyone was talking about me?" she sighed.

"I wish I could tell you that you had gone crazy and that you were imagining it, but em… they were. Sorry," he answered.

"Sorry?" she looked at him. "Why should _you_ be sorry? You didn't do anything."

This time it was Remus who sighed. He had been thinking about it for a long time and had decided what he had to do. It was the right thing to do, but also the hardest.

"Yes, I did. Actually this whole thing is my fault."

Lily looked at him with interest and tacitly urged him on. Remus, encouraged by her interest and not instant anger, continued.

"When I was little, I got bitten by a werewolf. And… well, you know what happens. You happened to catch me at a particularly bad time of the month. I am so sorry, Lily. I understand if you never want to be friends with me again." And with that closing statement, Remus stood up and left without a word from Lily.

Lily sat on the ground trying to comprehend what Remus had just told her. At first, she was angry. She was angry that Dumbledore would allow such a dangerous creature to be at Hogwarts. Lily suddenly gasped at what she had just thought. Remus was not a creature. He was a human being, an extremely talented wizard, a young man with a tiny problem. He was the Remus she had always known, just a little different. Lily was a well-read witch and she knew the effects of being a werewolf. She knew that once he became a… well a beast, he had no control. She was suddenly embarrassed for her ignorant, stupid actions. Her potions professor suddenly appeared outside the classroom.

"Miss Evans, will you be joining us?" he asked. To Lily he sounded reprimanding, but he was really just concerned.

"Of course, Professor," Lily responded, jumping up and following him into the classroom.

As she entered the classroom for the second time, Lily walked with her head held high. Emma and Katy were still not in the room and Lily was starting to wonder where they were. She sat at one of the only three available seats at a table by herself. And soon she couldn't even hear the constant whispering around her. Suddenly, to classroom door swung open and Katy and Emma burst in.

"Sorry, we're late, Professor!" apologized Emma.

"Yeah, we ran into a bit of a problem on the way to class," muttered Katy while shooting a glare at Sirius. Sirius looked back at her with a look of complete shock.

"Why, LeCompte! What on earth do you mean?" he exclaimed in a loud voice.

"BLACK, YOU KNOW EXACTLY WHAT I MEAN!" Katy yelled in frustration.

"Miss LeCompte, Mr. Black, silence or I will give you detention," interfered their potions professor.

Katy and Emma plopped down in the two empty seats next to Lily.

Lily wrote a quick note Emma, who was sitting next to her.

_What did he do?_

Emma wrote a long response.

_Well, we wanted to go see you in the Hospital Wing after lunch but we knew that we would be late so Black told us a short cut. Oddly enough when we took the short cut through a hallway we had never been down before we ended up in front of the kitchens, so we started to run to Potions when we slipped in a HUGE puddle of water and got soaking wet. We dried ourselves with a spell but no sooner had we dried ourselves than the puddle came off the floor and dumped itself on us. So we had to dry ourselves again and NOW we are late. _

After reading the note, Lily gave Katy and Emma a pitying look and realized that their hair was still wet. She sighed and glanced over at Sirius. He kept looking over at Katy and Emma and LAUGHING!!! Ok…. Now she was mad! No one messes with her best friends and gets away with it. Her thoughts were interrupted when she got another note.

_By the way, WE'RE SO GLAD YOU'RE BACK!!!!!!!!_

_Love, em and katy_

Lily smiled. She really did have great friends. And Black had screwed them over. She was definitely going to do something. But what?

Lily sat in the commons staring into the fire after classes were over. It was now three days before the Ball. Lily was worried Potter hadn't prepared everything that he said he had. But she wasn't really in the mood to talk to him. She remembered that she was really angry with him but for some odd reason, she couldn't remember why. And that made her feel really stupid and immature. So it was better to just not talk to him at all.

"Hey, Lils," she heard a murmur behind her.

Suddenly, Danny's arms were around her. Lily smiled.

"Hey," she whispered. She was surprised. Usually when Danny was being at all seductive she got butterflies in her stomach, now she wasn't. Maybe it was just an after affect of a "life altering event" or something.

"So did you hear what happened to Katy and Emma? It was funny, but not cool cuz they're your friends and all," Danny said, pulling out of seductive mode.

Lily almost fell over in surprise. She had just gotten out of the Hospital Wing after nearly DIEING! And all he could talk about was Emma and Katy? He couldn't ask how she was feeling? Tell her that he had missed her? That he was glad she was back? That he was scared when he almost lost her? This was too much insensitivity to take.

"EMMA AND KATY? You're not going to ask me how I am? Not going to even mention that I almost died?" she exclaimed, pushing him off her.

"What? But, Lily, I know you're okay. You're out of the Hospital Wing, aren't you? And you know I love you. You don't need me to tell you that. When did you become one of those girls?" he questioned.

"What kind of 'girls' are you talking about?" Lily countered.

"You know, the kind that always need their boyfriend to tell them they love them, that their pretty, that they are the most important person in their boyfriend's life. The needy, desperate girls who are too self-centered to be in a real, loving relationship. When did you become one of them?" he explained, his voice continually raising.

"MOST of those girls haven't almost died. MOST of those girls actually heard their boyfriend tell her he loves her more than once a month. MOST of those girls aren't me. And don't you EVER call me needy, desperate or self-centered again. Because not even a boyfriend has that right. And you're not even my boyfriend anymore," Lily hissed. And with that final statement, Lily turned on her heel and walked back to the Commons, leaving Danny in the dust.

As Lily entered the Commons, she couldn't quite figure out how she felt. She was disappointed that Danny hadn't cared more, which led her to be angry. And those words he had said stayed with her. Was she really becoming a clingy, needy, dependent person? That was definitely not who she wanted to be. And as she sat in front of the fire and looked inside herself, she realized that she was not completely dependent on anyone. She was Lily Evans, independent Head Girl of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Was that really it? Was that all she was?

That little spat she had had with Danny led to way to many questions about who she was and who she wanted to be. It was almost too much to handle. Lily sighed in exasperation. Then she realized, with a start, that she was single. Or was she? Was that just a meaningless fight? Or were she and Danny officially over? Well, whatever they were, Lily still didn't want to see him right away. She couldn't really prove him wrong unless she _knew_ that he was. And she wouldn't know that until she knew who she was. Lily sighed again. She just wanted to stop thinking about this. She looked around the Commons, hoping to find something to divert her from her thoughts. No one was in the Commons except the Marauders. Realizing she would rather fake a smile with them then sit alone with her thoughts, Lily got up and sat next to Remus.

"Hey, Lily," Remus greeted.

"Hi, guys," Lily answered. "So what are you up to? It's a little too quite over here."

"Oh, so that's why you came over…" mumbled James.

"What did you just say, Potter?" Lily snapped.

"Chill out, guys. Let's not start a fight," Remus intervened.

"Fine. I didn't say anything, Evans," James coolly replied.

"Hmph. That's what I thought. Anyway, no one told me what you guys are up to," Lily continued, trying her best to be nice.

"We can't really tell you. It's a SECRET!!" said Sirius in a stage whisper. He grinned as he put his finger up to his lips.

Lily suddenly felt very left out and looked down into her lap. She almost slapped herself on the arm for feeling that way. Feeling left out meant you relied on someone else to make you happy. And Lily relied on no one else for her emotions. That was normal, independent Lily. Not this weird "new" Lily, Lily didn't understand. She suddenly looked up, for no other reason than she felt awkward. James met her gaze immediately. It was obvious he had been looking at her and he had an odd look on his face, his head was slightly cocked to one side and he had a small smile playing at the corners of his lips. But his eyes conveyed something of concern.

The awkward trance the two were in was slowly being recognized by the other Marauders. Luckily, before anyone was tactless enough to ask what was going on (it would have been Sirius) Emma and Katy came bursting through the door to the Commons. This was enough to break Lily from her trance and she looked up at her two friends.

"Hey, guys," Lily greeted.

"Um, Lils, what are you thinking? You're fraternizing with the enemy," Katy whispered in Lily's ear.

"Well, if they don't think we're mad at them, it will be a much better prank," Lily improvised.

"Brilliant!" Emma remarked. "Hey, boys! How are you?" Emma said, very kindly.

"You're not um… mad at us?" Sirius asked. And although he sounded ashamed, the twinkle in his eye revealed something else.

"Of COURSE not," Katy cooed.

"Why would we be mad at you?" Emma continued, looking directly at Remus. She didn't realize any possible reason that anyone (a.k.a. Lily) might be angry at Remus. But Remus did, and he immediately looked at Lily. She smiled at him as a reply.

"There's no one in the world who could be mad at you," she said looking at Remus, "… no matter how stupid you are," she added looking at Sirius and James. Remus sighed gratefully as Lily sat next to him.

"Thanks, Lily, I'm so glad…" Remus began under his breath.

"I understand, Remus. Everyone has their problems," Lily interrupted.

For the millionth time that week, Remus felt so lucky to be surrounded by such loving, understanding friends.

"So, Potter, how's the Ball going to be?" Lily asked, changing the subject. She was sure he was going to ruin her…. er Emma and Katy's brilliant plan.

"Bloody fantastic! I'm sure it will all be great," James replied with a huge grin. "And, Sirius, because I'm Head Boy and planned this Ball… NO SPIKING THE PUNCH!!"

"And by 'no' you really mean do it, right? Don't worry, mate. I'm on it!" replied Sirius as he sided next to Emma on the couch. "Speaking of the Ball, Miss Rogers, I haven't yet picked the lovely lady who gets to accompany me. Would you like to be that lucky lady?" he asked her in a low voice with a suave grin that never failed to win him a girl's heart. No one heard him except Emma.

At first she was angry. This was two nights before the Ball. How did he know that she didn't already have a date? Then she felt desperate and happy because she actually DIDN'T have a date. Then, the most important emotion, she felt suspicious. This was Sirius Black. How could she ever take him seriously?

"Ha. Ha. Black, you amaze me with your humor. Why don't you go ask a slutty, brainless girl? I hear Rachel Starp is still available," Emma finally answered, with sarcasm in her dry humor.

Sirius just looked at her blankly. Finally he gave a little chuckle, but his eyes didn't seem to be as merry as usual. Well, maybe she was the first to ever reject him. Or maybe she caught his bluff and he felt upset. Whatever the reason, Emma decided it must not be too pertinent because a minute later, Sirius was laughing with Peter at the chess board. Emma just sighed and rolled her eyes. That boy was never going to grow up.

After chatting with the boys a little bit more, Lily, Katy and Emma decided to go up to bed. As they lie in their beds, the room was silent. Lily didn't tell her friends that she was possibly single. Emma didn't tell her friends that Sirius has asked her out. And Katy didn't tell her friends about the weird feeling she got in her stomach every time she looked at Remus.

"Guess what," Katy said to Lily as the three amigos walked down to the Great Hall for breakfast the next morning.

"What?" Lily asked, utterly bored and not expecting anything interesting.

"We figured out our own way to torture Black," announced Emma triumphantly. "We actually didn't need you to be the brains behind our scheme this time."

"Yeah, Emma thought of the idea and I found it in one our books this morning while you were in the shower," Katy added.

Lily acted proud and happy, but on the inside, she was crying. Great! So her boyfriend didn't need her, her friends didn't need her, who did need her?

"So are you going to tell me what it is?" asked Lily, bravely caring on her happy façade.

"Nope! You get to see it with the rest of the school," replied Katy, smugly.

"THE REST OF THE SCHOOL! Awww… come on! I'm your best mate!" Lily whined.

"That's right. And we love you. And we can't wait to see the look on your face when you see our surprise for Black," answered Emma.

"Why Sirius? What about the rest of the Marauders?" asked Lily.

"Black is obviously behind the whole scheme, as usual," replied Emma obviously. "This will get him back for playing with people and toying with their feelings," she added under her breath. No one heard her.

So Lily sat expectantly through the rest of breakfast until it happened. All of the sudden a large bubble appeared over Sirius' head and started depicting… scenes. Obviously scenes of Sirius' worst memories. Being the selfish, self-centered boy he was, most of them were just really embarrassing moments: falling off his broom in first year, losing a duel to a Slytherin, showing up to class without clothes on under his robe besides his boxers, etc. Sirius kept his hands over his eyes but parted his fingers so that he could see.

But then a couple scenes came up that weren't quite that funny. First, Sirius was standing in front of a man that looked extremely like him.

"No! I don't care if you're my father. I will never join him! You can't make me," Sirius was shouting.

"Son, you leave us no option. You are no longer welcome at our home. Pack your belongings and leave. I don't care where you go. Just go," said the man Lily gathered to be Sirius' father. She was amazed at the absence of remorse in his words.

"I don't want anything of yours. I'm gone now. Good-bye, sir. I hope I never see you or your family ever again," Sirius said. "Accio broom!" he whispered. His broom suddenly appearing at his side, Sirius mounted it and took off.

The scene faded out and another scene appeared.

It was late ate night and a very tired Remus, Sirius, James and Peter were walking towards the Potter Mansion.

"It was bloody awesome!" James was yelling.

"When that bludger knocked the seeker off his broom right before he caught the snitch I almost jumped for joy!" Sirius added with a huge grin on his face.

"Traitor," Peter commented. Sirius shot him a deathly glare.

"You know what he meant, Padfoot. It's not natural for an Englishman to be cheering for Bulgaria against England at the Quidditch World Cup," Remus quickly interfered.

Sirius backed down and tried to enjoy the night.

"It was such a perfect night for it, too. No rain. Not a cloud in si…" Sirius suddenly trailed off as he looked up at the sky. The other boys looked up and all of them stopped walking. For in the sky above the boys was the Dark Mark. James broke into a run toward the house.

"Mum? Dad? Sammy? Samantha? Where are you guys?" James was yelling and yelling, not really expecting an answer. He was running through the house tearing apart couches and curtains, pushing aside tables and chairs. Sirius, Remus and Peter were standing in the doorway, watching the whole thing. Finally, they heard an end to James' running upstairs. They could only guess what that meant and they ran upstairs after him.

When they found James, he was kneeling on the ground, staring at the bodies of his dead family. His face was dry and he was silent. Sirius separated himself from the group of friends and walked towards James. And though he was standing, Sirius began crying, because the Potter's had been his family too.

Finally this scene ended. By this time everyone was looking, not at Sirius, but at James, Lily included. James, unable to bear the attention and the memory, left the Great Hall and headed up to the Head Dormitories. Lily watched him and felt really guilty. She knew she hadn't done anything but her friends had. They had gone way too far. Lily looked at Katy and Emma. Katy, always the emotional one, had tears in her eyes. Emma was dry eyed, but both girls had sunk lower in their seats and wear staring at their food.

Though everyone thought that the morbid scene they had just seen was it, they were wrong. Even Emma and Katy looked up when they realized there was another scene.

Sirius, Remus, James and Peter were just lounging in the Gryffindor Commons in the beginning. Suddenly Lily came in. She greeted them and sat down next to Remus, who seemed surprised. James and Lily began to argue and then Remus settled them down. Lily just sighed. Sirius said something about a secret. Then Lily and James entered in a weird sort of trance. The rest of the Marauders picked up on it and were staring at the two, waiting for them to snap out of it or start making out then and there. Finally Emma and Katy walked in, though a viewer of the scene from Sirius' point of view only saw Emma. Only Lily knew Katy was there. And everyone else figured it out when she finally spoke and the focus moved to her. Eventually, the scene only involved Sirius and Emma. Off to the side, the audience heard someone say something about the upcoming Ball.

"Speaking of the Ball, Miss Rogers, I haven't yet picked the lovely lady who gets to accompany me. Would you like to be that lucky lady?"

There was a pause for a moment before Emma said anything. During that pause,

Any viewer could see that behind Sirius' suave grin was an immense amount of genuine hope.

"Ha. Ha. Black, you amaze me with your humor. Why don't you go ask a slutty, brainless girl? I hear Rachel Starp is still available," Emma finally answered.

Sirius chuckled and fell back into a slump in his seat. He had never felt this way before.

Later the girls had left and Remus and James were playing chess. Peter had disappeared as well, though no one really knew where he was. He said he had a meeting or something. Sirius, feeling so depressed, told his friends, who had kept asking him what was wrong, what had happened between Emma and himself.

"Haha. Well, Sirius, this is what it feels to get turned down," James joked. Remus joined in with a chuckle.

"I don't know guys. This is different. If it was just that I wouldn't be this upset. Honestly, I could find another girl more than willing to go with me in a hearbeat. But the odd this is… I wanted Emma to go with me." Sirius sighed. And the scene faded out.

Emma tried her hardest to disappear. Apparently her hardest wasn't enough because, with her eyes shut tight, she could feel all the stares on her. She quickly got up and ran out of the Great Hall. Lily and Katy rushed after her.

"Uh, way to tell us that Sirius had asked you out last night," Katy said as soon as they had caught up with Emma.

"Yeah! We're your best mates! We should know when you crush a bloke's heart like that," Lily added.

"Yeah, right. Like I actually broke his heart," Emma scoffed.

"Emma, that is B.S and you know it!" Katy replied.

"How do you know?" asked Lily giving Katy a questioning look.

"Because Emma knows as well as I do that the spell we cast on Sirius with showed his worst memories from the least horrific to the most. EMMA'S TURN DOWN WAS HIS WORST MEMORY EVER!!! Even worse then… well, you saw," Katy said, drifting off on the last part.

"Wow, Emma. It seems you've tamed the beast!" exclaimed Lily.

"Don't get your hopes up. Listen, I've got to go think. I'll see you both later," Emma said. They both stood in the spots as she turned and walked away.

"And as much as I don't want to, I should probably go check on Potter," added Lily. And with that she turned and walked in the opposite direction of Emma, towards the Heads Commons, where she guessed James must be.

Katy stood there, alone in the hallway.

"Great," she whined. "What am I supposed to say to Professor McGonagall?"

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

AN- A version of the idea of the scene thing above Sirius' head has definitely been used before. If you're reading this and one of your stories or a story you know of has that same sort of thing in it, please tell me the name of the author so I can give them the credit they deserve! AND PLEASE…. R E V I E W!!!! and sorry this took me so long to review… oh an read prongsie.jr… GREAT STORY!!! And thanks to read-on, Super Cara, Her EmeraldEyes, james-s2-lily and of course prongsie.jr for ur reviews! Ur awesome!


	9. Bad Happenings

**Sorry I took so long to write this chapter. I was so busy and now I have exams (which I should be studying for) but I had to write this chapter. Read and REVIEW please!**

Emma walked up the stairs, sat on her bed and lay there, staring at the ceiling. It had to be a lie. Sirius didn't go after girls like her. Sirius? Didn't she mean Black? When had she called him "Sirius"? Perhaps, when she started fancying him?

"Shut up!" she yelled out loud to no one.

_It wouldn't bother you so much if you knew it wasn't true,_ a little voice said in her head. Well, thinking certainly wasn't helping anything.

"UGH!" she exclaimed at she punched her pillow, got out of bed and stormed out of the room, fuming. She was angry at herself but she was angrier at Sirius because he was gorgeous, nice to her, amazing, smart, a great quidditch player, charming, and a huge womanizer. But he couldn't be lying. You couldn't lie in the charm she and Katy had placed. Why was life so difficult? Why couldn't she fancy a nice, normal boy? He didn't have to be anything special. Not only did she hate Sirius, she hated all those girls who he had snogged or gone out with, those bimbos, because now she felt as stupid as them. Not to mention she was extraordinarily jealous. Suddenly she got an idea.

Her sister, Meggie, had always been a great advisor. She wasn't exactly the most responsible person herself, but she always gave great advice. Emma always felt like she had done the right thing when she listened to Meggie. Feeling much better, Emma practically skipped to the owlery. Like her Henry, her owl, was physic, she suddenly saw him flying toward her. Then she realized he was carrying a letter for her.

_Duh_, she thought. _I need to focus_. All of this talk about Sirius was making her crazy.

"Thanks, Henry! Come up to my room later. I have something for you," she said to her owl. He clicked his beak as a sign that he understood and flew off. As a Muggle born witch, Emma had always thought that it was awesome that owls could understand their owners. She smiled as she realized the letter was from the very person she had wanted to send a letter.

Emma opened the letter and quickly read it. Her smile quickly faded. This could not be true. It had to be a lie. In a state of unbelief, Emma walked back up to her room. This time instead of feeling angry or confused, Emma felt nothing at all.

Lily walked back up the stairs she had just walked down to go to breakfast. Her stomach was in knots; she didn't know what to expect when she met Potter. Was he going to be crying again? Angry? Screaming? Or worst of all, silent with façade of calmness? With a deep breath, Lily opened the door and walked in to see Potter sitting on the windowsill, staring out at the Hogwarts grounds beneath him. A light frost lay over all the green and dead trees. The sky was cold and bleak, a grayish hue. She couldn't even tell if the sun was out or not. The Great Lake had a thin layer of ice on it that was cracked in many places and had a giant hole near one of the sides. All together, the scene beneath Potter seemed cold, heartless and bitter.

"Em… er… are you alright, Potter?" Lily asked timidly.

"What?" he looked up, finally noticing her. "Oh well… you know…"

Well, he hadn't been crying. But he also didn't have a forced control feeling about him.

"I'm so sorry. I had no idea what was going to happen," Lily said softly, walking towards him. She sat down and he looked back down to the grounds.

James sighed. "It's just that I hade finally gotten over it. I mean, well, as best I could. I'll always remember them and that pain I felt loosing them. I just have to remember they're in a better place," he said, looking at Lily.

"I don't know what loosing someone is like, to tell you the truth," Lily confessed looking in his eyes.

"I hope you never do, Evans," he told her. He meant it, too. It was the worst feeling in the world to lose his family, and he _never_ wanted Lily to feel like that. Unfortunately just then Lily jumped up.

"Oh, shit!" she exclaimed. James was surprised. He had never heard her curse before, he thought she was "above it" or something like that.

"Is something wrong?" he asked innocently.

"YES! THIS!" she yelled, thrusting a coin in his face. "FEEL THIS!"

He timidly touched the coin. "Ouch!" he said, as he yanked his hand back. The coin was burning and he hadn't been expecting that. "Why is that so hot?"

"There's something wrong. I gave another coin exactly like this to my mom and if something was wrong she was supposed to press her thumb on the figure's head," she explained. "I gave it to her during Christmas of my first year. She's never used it once. Potter, something's terribly wrong."

James looked into her eyes and could tell she was worried. "Come with me. Hurry!"

Suddenly Sirius burst into the room. "Merlin, James, I am so sorry. It was all my fault for pranking LeCompte and Rogers."

"It's fine, Sirius. Really, I'm over it. And obviously it was bad for you. It was your worst memory."

"Actually… well, I'll talk to you about that later."

Although James was mildly interested, he was much more concerned with Lily.

"Good, 'cause, Sirius, we have to go… Evans and me… it's really important. If anyone asks tell them I'm depressed and Evans is consoling me. Keep your mirror handy, I might need to talk to you. Got it," said James as he grabbed something from a chest and Lily's hand and rushed out the door. Sirius opened his mouth but, realizing the importance of the situation, shut it and nodded.

"Come on, Evans!" James told her and they began to run towards the doors outside the Great Hall. "Here, get in this cloak with me," James told Lily. Lily, too startled by all that was going on around her, hurried in the cloak with complete trust in James. "Now don't talk. We're invisible, but people can still hear and feel us." Lily silently nodded and they quickly walked out of Hogwarts to the Whomping Willow. Lily stared in amazement as James ran and quickly pressed a knot on the tree right before it hit him. The tree froze. Lily gasped. She didn't know the Willow did that. "Come on, Evans!" he said urgently. They both went into a tunnel and Lily, following James, ran towards the light. Lily didn't recognize where they came out.

"Where are we?" she asked.

"It doesn't matter. Hold my arm."

"Why?" she said, finally realizing how much she had been following Potter and wishing she could have lead some more.

"Before he did, my dad taught me apparition. He thought it would be important. You can do side-along apparition. Hold my arm."

Lily realized how urgent James was being. "You don't think it's too bad do you?" she asked with worried eyes.

James stopped for a second and answered truthfully. "I don't know, Lily. It could be."

The look in Lily's eyes suddenly changed from scared to aggressive and determined. She held onto his arm with both hands. "Well, what are you waiting for?"

She did not like apparition. It made her stomach queasy. And her head hurt. Everything was swirling before her eyes. Suddenly they stopped and she saw her house, her home, and above it was the Dark Mark.

James saw it at the same time. He whipped out a mirror from his pocket and said, "Sirius, hurry up!" Then, instead of James' face in the mirror, she saw Sirius'. "What? Are you ok?" "Go to Dumbledore and tell him to send Aurors to Lily Evans' house. NOW!" Sirius disappeared. Then James turned to Lily. "Stay here. I'm going inside."

"Shut up, Potter. They're my family," she said with a fierceness James had not expected.

"Fine. Take out your wand. And, Lily," he said. She turned to look at him, recognizing her first name, "be careful. Promise?"

"I promise," she answered with a cock of her head.

_Right. 'Cause I'm _trying_ to kill myself._ Lily thought.

"Let's go," she said, glad to be in charge for once. "I'm going first." She opened the door. Surprisingly she didn't hear anything. Holding her wand in front of her, she turned to enter the living room. There she saw it. Her mom, dad and sister were standing in the middle of the room. Five Death Eaters with their frightening masks surrounded them with their wands pointed at them. One, seeing her, turned and pointed his wand at her,

"_Cruc-_" Lily cut him off. "PETRIFICUS TOTALUS!" she yelled. He fell flat as a board on the ground. The others all saw her at once and all wands pointed now at her, all except one that remained pointed at her family. She made a move to being fighting.

"Ah ah ah. Not so fast, young lady," said the mask that had its wand pointed at her family. "Make one move and they're all gone."

Lily froze. Well, no one was killing or torturing anyone quite yet.

"What do you want?" she asked, through gritted teeth.

"We want to show you what happens when you interfere with the Dark Lord, Miss _Evans_," said the same mask. Except it was no longer a mask. He had taken off his mask to reveal long, white-blond hair tied with a ribbon. It was the same wizard she had seen torture the centaur…_ Malfoy_.

"Now the Dark Lord has decided to offer you a chance to redeem yourself."

"And why would I want to do that?" she spat.

"Oh, this might have something to do with it. You," he asked, pointing at Rhea, "step forward."

Lily's mother took a couple of steps forward, her head held high.

"_Crucio!_" Malfoy said, with what one might almost call carelessness.

Rhea collapsed on the ground. She screamed with pain, her body writhing on the ground. Tears were streaming down her face.

"STOP!! STOP!!" yelled Petunia.

Thomas just looked between Lily, his wife and Malfoy, helplessly. There was nothing he could do.

"I'LL DO IT! ANYTHING! STOP!" screamed Lily.

"That's what I thought," Malfoy sneered as the Curse lifted.

Rhea lay for a moment on the ground. Then, with the little pride she had left, she attempted to stand up but once she got to her knees she could go no further. She stopped on all fours, panting. A tear dropped down to the carpet. Thomas couldn't stand it any longer and jumped forward to help his love to her feet. And he picked her up and walked with her back to the middle of the room where he held her in his arms.

"I'm here, Rhea, I'm here," Thomas whispered comfortingly.

"I know," she answered. "I love you, Tom," she barely even whispered. She laid her head against his chest.

"How beautiful," Malfoy sneered. "So are you ready to hear the proposition?"

Lily stood still. She was unsure what to do. She looked at her family, frightened, in pain, her mum was possibly dying, Petunia looked like she was about to pass out, and her dad, her strong, protective father, looked for once in his life, utterly helpless and afraid. And what exactly had happened to Potter? Did he run away? Too much to handle?

"It's simple. Spy on Dumbledore."

"NO!" she immediately responded.

"Ah, well, that's unfortunate…"

The door suddenly burst open and in came two big men. They had their wands drawn and, once they had entered the living room, stood prepared to fight.

"Don't move!" warned Malfoy. "I'll kill them all!"

Gideon and Fabian Prewitt, the two Aurors that had just entered, froze. It seemed like the Death Eaters had full advantage. One of them had Lily at the end of their wand and both of the Prewitt brothers had a wand pointed at them, and Malfoy had the entire Evans family at his disposal.

Out of no where, they all heard a yell "PETRIFICUS TOTALUS!" Before anyone could react, Malfoy fell on the ground. No one could see where the jinx had come from but it was like the shot before a horse race; the fight immediately broke out. Thomas, although he had no wand, fought his way through with his unarmed wife and daughter through the door towards the kitchen. Lily dodged a Cruciatus curse but couldn't find the prescence of mind to fight back. She hadn't seen her family and was looking amid the chaos of spells, curses and jinxes now flying between the Prewitt brothers and their attackers. She only realized a moment later that the Death Eater attacking her had stopped. She looked behind her at him… her… whatever it was. James Potter had appeared from no where and was fighting for her. She felt that need for independence surge through her.

"I can fight!" she suddenly yelled at Potter.

"GET YOUR FAMILY!" he yelled, never taking his eyes off the Death Eater he was fighting. Lily stood still for a moment. Then she ran towards the door. She was back in the hallway.

"Mum?! Dad?! 'Tunia?!" she yelled. Hearing no answer, she moved on to the next room. There was her family again being held hostage. They were up against the window in the kitchen. The Death Eater Lily had earlier paralyzed was now mobile again and while no one had noticed him, he had slipped off following the Evans'.

"The Dark Lord is going to be so proud of me. I shall do what Malfoy could not. And further more I will do so in a way to torture you," he said nodding towards Lily. She raised her wand, but knew that it was useless.

"I'll do anything," she quietly begged.

"No, Lily, don't," said Rhea finally speaking.

"We don't know what's going on but its obviously an important and dangerous thing they have asked of you," Thomas added.

"We're not worth it!" Rhea finished.

"SHUT UP!" yelled the Death Eater.

"Yes, you are!" said Lily, ignoring his command, "you guys are the world to me!"

"It's too late," said the Death Eater. "You lost your chance to save them. It's going to be your fault when they die."

"It's not your fault!" yelled Thomas.

"Sweetheart, don't listen to him!" added Rhea. Petunia was still silent with fear.

"I have to," Lily whispered. Out of no where the Death Eater exclaimed, "THIS IS TAKING TOO LONG! _CRUCIO!_" He pointed his wand at Thomas. Lily closed her eyes. She couldn't see this.

"STOP!!! STOP!!!" she screamed on top of her father's screams of pain.

"Why should I do that?" And although Lily couldn't see his face, she could hear in his voice the Death Eater was _smiling_. Her body seemed to overflow with anger.

"_CRUCIO!_" she screamed. He stopped the Curse on Thomas with a small scream of surprise. But then she heard his smiling voice again,

"You're too young. You don't love causing pain. You _can't _cause pain. But this should be an interesting little lesson," he told her. "_CRUCIO!_" he yelled now pointing at Rhea. She fell on the ground again, screaming, crying. The only coherent word Lily heard was "THOMAS!!" She looked at her father, lying on the ground… motionless.

She felt the anger again. "_CRUCIO!!!_" she yelled. The pain she caused in the Death Eater lasted a fraction of a second longer this time. Her mother's screaming stopped.

"That was a better try, but not by much. There was more anger that time. But not enough hate. Better work on that. Well, we have one more to go. Maybe you'll be better this time," he sneered. Petunia whimpered.

Suddenly James burst in. "EXPELIARMUS!" he yelled. The Death Eater's wand flew from his hand. He was caught totally by surprise. "Stupid boy! I am highly skilled in wandless ma-" but he was cut off when Lily yelled, "STUPEFY!" He fell in a heap on the ground. Lily turned to Potter.

"What about the others?" she quickly asked.

"Unconscious or gone," he replied, quietly.

"Mum," Lily whispered breathlessly as she rushed to her mother's side. There was a blood dripping from her mother's open mouth. "I'm here, Mum. Don't worry." Lily wiped the blood away with her sleeve but it soon more returned.

"I'm... not… worried," she replied, taking deep breaths after each word.

"We can get you to St. Mungo's," Lily told her.

"No, sweetheart, I'm not going to last long enough," Rhea told her daughter, speaking so softly Lily had to lean closely to hear her. Lily grabbed her mother's hand and held on tight.

"I'm so sorry, Mum, it's all my fault," Lily started crying.

"No, shh… shh… You did the best you could. And, Lily, your father and I are so proud of you," Rhea whispered. "Speaking of you father, where is he?"

Lily looked across the room where Thomas was speaking softly with Potter who had tears in his eyes. Lily got an idea and she didn't know if it would work but it was worth a try.

"Wingardium Leviosa," she said calmly, pointing her wand at Thomas. He was lifted off the ground by an invisible force and she directed him towards her and her mother.

"Daddy," she whispered. The tears were streaming down her face by now. "Oh, Daddy. I'm so sorry. This is all my fault. It's… all… my…" she sobbed, shaking.

"Don't be silly, Lily. You've always been so intelligent, my smart, beautiful little flower."

Lily let out a little laugh and salty tears washed into her mouth.

"Lily, I love you. Don't ever forget that. Don't think for a minute this is your fault. That would only hurt me more. You fought so well. I'm so proud of you," Thomas whispered, smiling with much effort.

"Thomas?" Rhea said, turning to face him.

"Oh, Rhea, I'm so sorry. I should have been able to protect you!" he gasped.

"You sound like Lily, so silly. Be quiet. I love you…" she answered.

"I love you too…" Rhea grasped his hand and held on tight, her eyes closed and her chest stopped rising and falling. Lily noticed but Thomas was looking at his flower.

"Goodnight, Lily," he whispered.

"Oh, Daddy," she sobbed.

"Say it," he begged.

"Sleep tight, Daddy," she relented.

"Don't let the bed bugs bite…" and then his chest stopped moving as well and his eyes close and they were both gone. Lily grasped both of her parents hands, stayed there on her knees, and cried and cried. It seemed like the rivers flowing from her eyes would never stop. Then she remembered Petunia. She looked up. Petunia was lying on the ground, passed out from shear terror.

Depression over took Lily. Her parents were dead. Her sister wasn't even there to go through it with her. She was alone. The world around her started to spin. She stood up. The world was spinning faster and faster. Right before she fell, she felt two arms grab her fast but then everything went black.

"James, remember your promise. Remember to watch over Lily. Please. That's all I ask of you."

Those were the only words Thomas had said to James. He had been lifted away and James watched from where he stood as Lily grieved. She wouldn't want him right now, he was sure. But he finally saw her stand up, she started swaying and he ran and caught her. He picked her up. Where should they go? Could he Apparate with her like this? He was weak, as was she.

Thankfully, being the perfect timer he is, Dumbledore walked in on the scene.

"Oh my…" he whispered when he saw Lily in James' arms and her family lying on the ground.

"Sir, we need to get back to Hogwarts," James said firmly.

"Of course, of course," Dumbledore said after his initial shock had worn off. He pulled some floo powder out of his pocket and threw it into the fire which immediately turned green. "You know what to do," he added.

James stepped into the fire and said calmly, clearly, "Hogwarts."

They arrived in the Headmaster's office. James never put Lily down and carried her to the Hospital Wing.

"Not again," muttered Madam Pomfrey, "poor dear…"

_She has no idea_, thought James. He laid Lily out onto a bed and turned to leave. As much as he wanted to stay with Lily, he knew she would want Katy and Emma here and he had to go there.

As he walked toward the door, he stumbled and fell. He was so physically exhausted.

"I don't think so," Madam Pomfrey said, watching him walk away. "Get in this bed," she said pulling back the sheets of the bed next to Lily. Truthfully, he was grateful to fall into bed and tried to sleep away his troubles.

**So what did you think? Please review. I don't want to write more if no one is reading/reviewing. Thanks! **


End file.
